Archive for 2024

IT’S COME TO THIS: In New Disney Star Wars Series, Force Produces Kids via Lesbian Witches.

Disney’s destruction of the “Star Wars” franchise has reached peak demolition with its new series, “The Acolyte.”

In the past, Disney has created “Star Wars” shows that are woke, incoherent or girl-bossy, with the exception of early seasons of “The Mandalorian” and “Andor.” But the “House of Mouse” has straight-up lost its mind with this new series, released on June 4th.

The first two episodes of “The Acolyte,” set long before the Republic crumbled and the Empire took over, premiered last week. The opening episodes fulfilled Hollywood diversity quotas while rolling out a murder mystery in which Jedi are killed by a mysterious woman with force powers.

In episode one, “Lost,” a former Padawan named Osha (Amandla Stenberg) is arrested as the likely suspect. By episode two, “Revenge/Justice,” the Jedi realize that the murderer is actually Osha’s evil twin sister, Mae (also played by Stenberg).

Last night, Disney premiered episode three, “Destiny,” which revealed the twins’ back story. It’s in this new episode that the series went off the rails. It turns out that Osha and Mae were created and birthed by two lesbian witches, Mother Aniseya (Jodie Turner-Smith) and Mother Koril (Margarita Levieva).  As the lesbian couple tells each other:

Koril: I carried them.

Aniseya: I created them.

In this galactic feminist fantasy, lesbians don’t need a man to make a baby.

Perhaps still reeling from the savage “Put a chick in it, make her gay, make it lame!” critique from South Park last year, Kathleen Kennedy has taken that formula to its logical conclusion.

Related: The Critical Drinker takes one for the team, and sits through the Acolyte’s second episode:

 

MAYBE HE DIDN’T KNOW THERE’S A LAW AGAINST THAT: Travis County Assistant DA Arrested For Aggravated Assault With A Deadly Weapon. “So here’s a 51 year old Assistant DA, who’s worked in the DA’s office for 17 years, he lives in an apartment with a roommate, and his idea of entertainment for a visiting guest is to stream pornography. Which he evidently has trouble viewing, so he demands his roommate help fix the issue.”

I DO NOT TRUST THE INTERNET OF THINGS; I TRUST IT LESS WHEN IT’S MADE IN COMMUNIST CHINA:

Good on the Netherlands for switching to Western-made gear. We should do the same but it’ll never happen with CCP Joe (nominally) in charge.

IT’S HARD TO SEE THESE THINGS BEING REALLY USEFUL UNTIL THE HALLUCINATION PROBLEM IS LICKED: AI speech-to-text can hallucinate violent language. “Speak a little too haltingly and with long pauses, and OpenAI’s speech-to-text transcriber might put harmful, violent words in your mouth, Cornell researchers have discovered.”

GOODER AND HARDER, CALIFORNIA: California Gas Prices to Go from Bad to Worse as Dems Move to Tighten Environmental Regulations.

California Democrats are planning to send the state’s astronomical gasoline prices soaring even higher by strengthening a pair of decade-old climate policies.

The California Air Resources Board (CARB), whose most senior members are appointed by Governor Gavin Newsom, is considering amending two regulations — the Low Carbon Fuel Standard (LCFS) and the cap-and-trade program — to help the state meet its carbon-reduction goals. But in the process, gas taxes will increase significantly over the next two years and beyond.

Gas prices could increase by as much as 47 cents per gallon by 2025 and by 52 cents by 2026, according to CARB’s September 2023 report on the potential impact of the proposed LCFS amendments. Gas taxes could surge by as much as $1.15 per gallon on average from 2031 to 2046, hitting a peak of $1.83 in 2041. California drivers currently pay about 12 cents per gallon in additional gas taxes because of the LCFS program, per the report’s projections.

Sacramento views this headline as a how-to guide, not a warning: How Jacinda Ardern left New Zealand on the brink of blackouts.

OH:

21st CENTURY HEADLINES: AI Beauty Pageant Judge: There’s A Lack Of Diversity & Inclusion Amongst Contestants.

Disclaimer: Not a single woman seen in this post is a real human. NOT ONE. These biological AI females are FAKE. Don’t you dare come after me if one of these fake chicks takes all your money via Venmo or some other cash app. You’ve been warned.

Now that the disclaimer is out of the way, let’s get down to business here: this post is about a Miss AI beauty pageant.

It’s believed that this is the very first time 10 completely fake women have battled it out for fake beauty bragging rights and there’s already drama building.

A real-life AI pageant judge, Sally-Ann Fawcett (she’s a real human who has judged some of the biggest real pageants in the world) told National Public Radio that there aren’t enough flawed contestants.

But of course.