EVERYTHING IS GOING SWIMMINGLY: Inflation forcing retirees back into jobs. “One out of four adults said that inflation is the single greatest threat to their retirement plans in 2022, according to Schwartz Center for Economic Policy Analysis. That’s more than concerns about health care costs, outliving your money or job security combined.”

BIDEN DID THAT: Guess Who Democrats Will Blame for Their Midterm Election Losses?

HEY, TEACHER, LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE: New Jersey Lesson Plan Endorses Puberty Blockers to Fifth Graders to ‘Manage’ Teen Years.

CHRIS WALLACE HARDEST HIT: CNN+ Had the Most Embarrassing Launch Ever, Big Cuts Coming. “What was the pitch? The network of sex scandals, the Cuomo boys, pedophiliacs, and low-budget partisan propaganda wants your money!“

COVID IS OVER: Just 9% think the pandemic is a ‘serious crisis’ in a warning to lawmakers planning to bring back mask mandates and restrictions in response to latest wave.

I WONDER HOW TRIGGERED SHE’D BE BY AN AUDIT: BLM Co-Founder Says She Gets ‘Triggered’ by Charity Transparency Laws.

EVERYTHING IS GOING SWIMMINGLY: Baby-Formula Shortage Prompts Rationing at Target, Kroger, Walgreens and CVS.

GET’EM SKEERED AND KEEP THE SKEER ON ‘EM: Republican PAC Going for the ‘Kill’ in House Districts Where Biden Won Big. “While it is true that I usually like to err on the side of caution, these are dire times. I find myself more in a kind of ‘if you’ve got your enemy in a rout, keep routing’ mood lately. Rather than waste money piling on in races that will more than likely flip Republican in November, why not think outside the box?”

DADDY ISSUES? While Everyone Else Is Kicking Themselves For Voting For Biden, College-Educated Women Are Doubling Down. “Singlehood, a general predictor among women of increased vote share for Democrats, is rising, a trend that is likely to increase. Although we don’t have the underlying NBC polling numbers to confirm this, it seems likely this is a large explanatory factor for the college-educated women increasing support for Democrats.”

KEVIN DOWNEY JR: How White Liberals and Black Leaders Sacrifice Black Lives for Self-Esteem and Profit. “This sounds ludicrous to mentally healthy people, but in the world of woke white people, it’s business as usual. It also makes them feel superior to conservatives who aren’t afraid to hold people responsible for their actions, whatever their race. I know; I used to be one of them.”

I COULDN’T HELP BUT NOTICE: Grocers Push Through Inflation, Passing Higher Prices to Shoppers.

Supermarket operators including Albertsons Kroger and others are reporting rising sales, driven by increasing food prices and consumers continuing to prepare many meals at home. Profits are rising for grocery chains too as they raise prices of many products rather than absorb all increases, though some executives have said that inflation is starting to alter consumers’ shopping habits.

The U.S. Department of Labor said Tuesday that inflation grew to a four-decade high of 8.5% in March from the same month a year ago. Food prices rose 8.8% from last year, with grocery prices increasing 10%.

Albertsons executives said Tuesday that the Boise, Idaho-based grocer, which operates its namesake stores as well as Jewel-Osco and Safeway chains, is managing inflation well and gaining market share. Consumers so far haven’t made big changes in how they shop, executives said, though they expect low-income shoppers to start buying fewer groceries later in the year.

Brace for stagflation.

THIS TIME THEY’VE GOT HIM FOR SURE: Liz Cheney Touts Criminal Charges Against Trump.

I’M SO OLD, I REMEMBER WHEN WE USED TO PUMP MORE OF OUR OWN: OPEC tells EU it’s not possible to replace potential Russian oil supply loss. “OPEC told the European Union on Monday that current and future sanctions on Russia could create one of the worst ever oil supply shocks and it would be impossible to replace those volumes, and signalled it would not pump more.”

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEFING: Mitt Romney Seems To Know That He’s Jeff Flaked Himself. “Republicans aren’t a hive mind like the Democrats. There are always members of the GOP in Congress who are willing to swim upstream in their own party just to get a pat on the head from The New York Times. Yes, the Democrats have had their struggles recently with Joe Manchin, Kyrsten Sinema, and AOC but they’re anomalies. There is always a Manchin, Sinema, or AOC hanging around the GOP.”

THE LONG MARCH BACK THROUGH THE INSTITUTIONS: Conservative activist now leads student government that blocked her club.

CHRIS QUEEN: DeSantis Just Keeps Winning. “DeSantis signed another bill into law that will strengthen families in the Sunshine State. The initiative sets aside $70 million in state funds to provide resources that benefit families and children in Florida, including programs that promote fatherhood and help young fathers.”

WATCH: Patriotic Bird Poops on Biden, Speaks For Entire Nation.

I REMEMBER WHEN THIS WAS MANDATORY FOR SIXTH GRADERS, BUT BETTER LATE THAN NEVER, I SUPPOSE: Bipartisan bill would require civics course for NJ college students.

TYPHOID MARYS: 32,000 travellers from mainland China arrived on hundreds of flights over four weeks in early 2020. “After two years of delays, Transport Canada finally coughed up data about travellers from China at the beginning of the pandemic.”

JUST IN TIME FOR THE MIDTERMS: New York Times Resurrects Its Religious Right Bogeyman. “The New York Times was once so crafty about its particular brand of bias that I would occasionally praise the organization for the effort it put into feigning objectivity. Like so many individuals and institutions, however, Donald Trump’s election in 2016 broke the powers that be at the Times.”

DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS: Lina Hidalgo Aides Indicted On Corruption Charges. “My working assumption is that any time you see smoke like this, the fire is almost invariably channeling taxpayer money to the pockets hard-left Democratic Party cronies.”

HMM: U.S. and U.K. ‘Closely Monitoring’ Reports of Russia’s Use of Chemical Weapons in Mariupol.

“GREEN” ENERGY: Wind energy company pleads guilty after 150 eagles are killed at its farms in 8 states, including Colorado. “CEO of ESI Energy owner NextEra Energy says deaths of bald and golden were unavoidable accidents that should not be criminalized. NextEra has 10 wind farms in Colorado.”

GOOD GUY WITH A GUN: Reason # 1 to Own a Gun: Intruder Shot in Head While Breaking Into Child’s Bedroom.

DISPATCHES FROM THE BLUE ZONES: Illinois Democrats’ plan to force retailers to post ‘tax relief’ details is unconstitutional, election year propaganda. “Budget bills introduced by Illinois Democrats in the waning hours of session and that were passed early Saturday will require private-sector retailers to notify consumers of temporary “tax relief” measures included in them. Critics say the requirements are an unconstitutional violation of free speech rights and forced campaign propaganda during an election year.”