THAT WOULD SEEM SOMEWHAT OF A MINIMUM STEP TO TAKE:  China’s ‘Love Hospital’ saves marriages by getting rid of mistresses.

NO, SHE ISN’T. SHE JUST HAS TWO DIFFERENT GENETIC CODES.  GEEESH. CRAZY PEOPLE.  This woman is her own twin sister.

IT’S RETURNING! WE’RE DOOMED, DOOOOOOOMED, I TELL YOU!  Creepy skull-shaped asteroid to haunt Earth again.

I TOLD HER SHE DIDN’T HAVE TO DO THIS.  I TOLD HER IT WOULD DRIVE HER CRAZY.  AND YET SHE PERSISTED, AND I SHAMELESSLY ECHOED IT ON MY BLOG: My friend Amanda Green continues reading Hillary’s book.  HRC: Those Damn Emails by Amanda S. Green

APPARENTLY THE GERMANS AREN’T FANS EITHER.  GOOD THING WE’RE AN INDEPENDENT NATION:  Surprise! Russia and China Don’t Like Trump’s “America First” Policies.

YEAH.  NO PROTECTED CLASS IS ALLOWED TO STEP OUT OF LINE:  The Deep Racism of the Left.

AND SCALISE REPLIES: Maestro of Obama’s Echo Chamber, Ben Rhodes, Speaks Darkly of Wishing for the Obituaries of Pence, Ryan, and McConnell.

IF THOSE GRAN POOBAHS OF SCLEROTIC CRONYISM DON’T SEE YOURS, I’LL SHOW THEM MINE. I HAVE A MATCHED SET!  Dear UN – See This Middle Finger?

WAIT.  THEY THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE A GOOD IDEA?  Amazon realizes DIY circumcision kit might be a bad idea.

OF COURSE WE ARE.  HAVE YOU SEEN THE REST OF THE WORLD?  Americans are stressed out.

OTOH THEY MIGHT STILL BE DUMB ENOUGH TO SWALLOW FEMINISM.  WOULD KIND OF DEFEAT THE WHOLE PURPOSE:  Future sex robots could become intelligent enough to cheat.

YEAH I KNOW, BUT IF WE’RE GOING TO HAVE NASA IT’S GOOD TO SEE THEM DOING SOMETHING THAT MAKES MORE SENSE THAN OUTREACH TO MUSLIMS:  NASA planning interstellar mission for 2069.

THE YEAR IS ALMOST OVER.  HAVE YOU ROTATED YOUR CAT?  Cat Rotation: A Primer.

I’M SHOCKED, SHOCKED:  UVA Won’t Recognize Conservative Student Group That Insists Members Be Conservative.

I LOST ACTUAL IQ POINTS READING THE TOM HANKS QUOTE: I think the man might believe the Constitution is something newspapers publish.  Or perhaps something you eat with onions.  Makes about as much sense as what he said.   Democracy dies in dimness.  Hey, Mr. Hanks, there is a reason you get paid for mouthing other people’s words.  Let’s keep your speech to that, okay?  And no, not the Washington Post’s words.  They ain’t none too bright, either.

WHEN DID THE GERMANS BECOME AMERICAN DEMOCRATS:  Or American democrats become Germans.  Life is very confusing, right now.  Germans Fear Tax Cut Will Spur US Investment and Growth.  Would shipping Rosie O’Donnell to Germany be considered an act of war?

HE’S TURNING OUT SO MUCH BETTER THAN I COULD EVER HAVE DREAMED:  Trump Threatens to Cut Foreign Aid to Countries That Vote to Forbid the US from Recognizing Jerusalem as Israel’s Capital.

I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I’VE PREPARED FOR THE APOCALYPSE RESULTING FROM PEOPLE GETTING TO KEEP SOME MORE OF THEIR OWN MONEY BY COLLECTING RECIPES ON HOW TO COOK MY NEIGHBORS!  Tax Bill Passes, Democrats Cry “Heist!” Seriously, is anyone else tired of the “Wha, if we don’t have punitive taxation for the rich, civilization will fall!”  Idiots, fools and economic illiterates.  Moral illiterates, too.

BECAUSE THE MOTHERSHIP FROM PLANET DERP IS LATE FOR A PICKUP:  Why is Rosie O’Donnell still here?

PARENTS THROW TANTRUM AND NEED A TIME OUT:  Parents upset over Ivanka’s surprise visit to high school.

WHAT DO THEY MEAN, WE? AND THE PLANET’S NAME IS BARSOOM!  Mars could be more otherworldly than we thought.

IN THE EMAIL AND ON SALE FROM MARINA FONTAINE:  Chasing Freedom.

Freedom is lost, but not forgotten.
In 2040s America, life is cheap and necessities are scarce. Yet even in the midst of drudgery and despair, unbroken spirits remain.
Julie is a young woman with a plan to ignite the spark of resistance. Randy dreams of winning Julie’s love and escaping the emptiness of over-regulated life. Joseph seeks revenge on the system for a family tragedy. Daniel is a young artist who can’t seem to stay out of trouble. Chris is an orphan prepared to do the unthinkable to protect his younger sister.
Whether by choice or by accident, each will take a path on a collision course with the oppressive regime. Will they find the freedom they desire? Or will the cost of defiance prove too high to bear?
Marina Fontaine is an immigrant from the former Soviet Union. She uses personal experience to craft a novel that takes an intimate look at life in a totalitarian society and the role that individual choices play in advancing the cause of liberty.

TO BE FAIR HARRY REID HOPES TO GET A RIDE BACK TO HIS HOME PLANET:  So Apparently There Are UFOs or Whatever.

THIS IS MY SHOCKED FACE:  Linda Sarsour Alleged To Have Covered For Sexual Assault.

IN THE EMAIL FROM KEVIN J. ANDERSON: (And a series I’ve actually enjoyed.)  Tastes Like Chicken (Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I.)

Dan Shamble, zombie P.I. faces his most fowl case yet, when a flock of murderous feral chickens terrorizes the Unnatural Quarter. Also in the caseload, Dan deals with the sinister spokesman for Monster Chow Industries, a spreading contamination that drives vampires berserk, a serial-killer demon from the Fifth Pit of Hell, a black-market blood gang led by the nefarious Ma Hemoglobin, a ghost fighting a hostile takeover of his blood bars…and a cute little vampire girl who may, or may not, be his daughter. With his ghost girlfriend Sheyenne, his bleeding-heart lawyer partner Robin, and his Best Human Friend Officer Toby McGoohan, Dan Shamble is back from the dead and back on the case. The feathers will fly as he goes face-to-beak with the evil peckers. Includes the short story Road Kill.