WELL, HE’S RIGHT:

BREAKING: U.S. sanctions International Criminal Court President Tomoko Akane, with Secretary of State Marco Rubio calling the ICC a “sham of a court.” pic.twitter.com/aS2fnYYYkh

— Polymarket (@Polymarket) August 18, 2026

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEFING: Axios — Dems Might Be Commies but, Hey, They’re Sexy! “Using a favorite modern liberal buzzword, Axios is trying to normalize the commie element that’s been stirring things up for the Democratic National Committee. If they can focus on the fact that Abdul El-Sayed is wearing t-shirts to show off his biceps, they might be able to distract some voters from the fact that he’s a far-left, terrorist-loving cancer.”

HMM: OpenAI builds dedicated ChatGPT experience for teens with parental controls and study features.

The ChatGPT for Teens portal will serve as the default experience on the artificial intelligence (AI) chatbot for users between the ages of 13 and 17 and will come with new safeguards aimed at fostering the safe use of the platform and supporting teens’ critical thinking skills.

OpenAI said that most teen users of ChatGPT use it for homework and help with their studies, so the new platform is intended to allow for study aides without giving the answers away and was designed with Stanford University.

It will feature quizzes and responsible-homework reminders that redirect teens toward collaborative problem-solving, as well as a Study Hours feature that allows teens or parents to set Study Mode as a default during certain time periods.

Those seem like sensible guardrails, but my wife and I wouldn’t even let our kids have social media until they were at least 16 — so this might’ve been a hard No, too.

ICYMI: How in the Actual Hell Can We Be Running Out of Space Rockets?

THE MULLAHS AREN’T SENDING THEIR BEST: UAE says it detected 2 missiles fired from Iran; both fell into water.

Iran’s firing of missiles at the UAE comes as talks between the U.S. and Iran appear to have fallen apart.

“There are no talks or conversations going on, or scheduled, with the Islamic Republic of Iran,” President Trump wrote Tuesday morning on Truth Social.

The president doubled down on his calls to annex the Strait of Hormuz, a crucial waterway dividing Iran and Oman, by posting an image of a map with the strait being labeled as a U.S. territory.

“We control it with the blockade, and I like the idea of declaring it a territory,” Trump told reporters at the White House on Monday when asked about the waterway.

Trolling?

THE NOMENKLATURA OF THE PROLETARIAT:

‘Union electrician’ DSA socialists be having $1.5 million Brooklyn row houses bought for them by their parents. https://t.co/HJr0pAeJG8 pic.twitter.com/88yvqnigEg

— Coddled Affluent Professional (@feelsdesperate) August 18, 2026

Guessing he might not do all that much electrical work.

CLASS ACT: Jon Ossoff Knew EXACTLY What He Was Implying About This Cancer Survivor.

THAT MAKES SENSE: Paramount wants states, WGA to post $1.9B bond to cover merger pause losses.

EMOTIONAL ANTIBODIES ARE JUST AS VITAL AS THE REGULAR KIND:

This is THE core reason so many people have mental health issues today. Too many people grew up being coddled to such an extent that they can't successfully navigate a lot of ordinary activities and conversations. So they live their lives anxious, afraid, and struggling to cope. https://t.co/rgvpARQLvR

— John Hawkins (@johnhawkinsrwn) August 18, 2026

I DID PRETTY WELL IN BIO AND HAVE NO RECOLLECTION OF THIS: New York Socialist Lawmaker Claims That Poor People Have a ‘Biological Need’ to Steal.

GO AWAY: Woke Mob Tries to Sink Children’s Ride. Owner Doesn’t Give a Ship.

A handful of parents in England decided a Titanic-themed children’s slide was the iceberg to die on. The slide has been there for years. Nobody cared until the slide’s return this summer.

At Graveley Fruit Farm near Hitchin, Hertfordshire, just north of London, £2 buys a turn on the ride. Children climb into a replica of the ship’s stern, which rises and sends them down four slides onto a crash mat.

Graveley opened in 1981 and offers fruit picking in summer, crazy golf, a playground, and water slides. The Titanic ride ran for several years before returning in May; the online complaints showed up this summer.

Before each turn, the children get boarding passes. The farm calls the trip a “wreck,” and about 500 people use the ride on a busy day. Roughly 500 children happily abandoning ship, and until recently, very few adults demanding an inquiry.

That changed on Facebook.

I haven’t been on Facebook since 2018 or 2019, when the company demanded my phone number to complete my login. It appears nothing has changed.

ASKING (AND ANSWERING) THE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS: How in the Actual Hell Can We Be Running Out of Space Rockets?

THE PROCESS IS THE PUNISHMENT FOR DARING TO EXERCISE YOUR 2ND AMENDMENT RIGHTS: Why Can’t Connecticut Seem to Keep It’s Firearm Background Check System Online?

STURDY, TOO:

Something made obvious by this photo is how light Starship is

It needs to be, of course, because the lighter the ship the less fuel needed to lift it and more to spare for cargo

But it almost looks like it is just sitting on the surface

It’s weight equals that of the water it… https://t.co/Q84O38UOpI pic.twitter.com/7UkbzRS8nV

— IQ 589 | Cody Penn-Dent | Effluencer (@codypd) August 18, 2026

And even more pics:

This is fantastic, it's not only an engineering marvel that it flew, but a maritime marvel that they got it back to land from where it splashed down. Bravo to everyone involved! https://t.co/OSZUGijP83

— Kal Spriggs (@KalSpriggs) August 18, 2026

Starship flight 14 is tentatively set for Aug. 28.

DANIEL MCCARTHY: Democrats’ Southern Strategy. “It’s actually about keeping power in the hands of the party establishment, the people who backed Hillary Clinton in 2016 and Joe Biden in 2020, and who are likely to wind up supporting Kamala Harris in 2028.”

They sure can pick’em.

DOES THIS MEAN HE’S RUNNING? Ossoff: ‘Zero interest’ in running for president in 2028.

CHANGE YOU CAN BELIEVE IN: The FBI Marks the Largest Year-to-Year Decline In Violent Crime Since, Well, Ever.

WOLFGANG IS A PARODY ACCOUNT…:

It’s only a little bit facile to say that the implicit claim of his defenders was that he was a scholar because he identified as a scholar https://t.co/IQiKBmC2xr

— Wesley Yang (@wesyang) August 18, 2026

…but I had to double-check to make sure.

NOTHING TO SEE HERE, MOVE ALONG: NSA sat on election threat reporting over Trump ‘deep state’ label, memo shows. “In a tense March 2020 meeting just months before the presidential election, the National Security Agency’s (NSA) deputy director blocked the release of a long-delayed report on foreign targeting of U.S. elections—not because the intelligence was flawed, but because he feared it would brand the agency as part of the ‘deep state.'”

THIS IS THE SAME THING DISNEY DID TO STAR WARS:

Nike has lost nearly 80% of its market cap over the last 5 years. When the stock was near its peak, Ethan Strauss wrote the definitive take on how the company was fumbling the bag.

They were a brand defined by Michael Jordan’s competitiveness and machismo, and with a heavily… https://t.co/AVFGtT5FST pic.twitter.com/A2SMgwmJuM

— Daniel Friedman (@DanFriedman81) August 17, 2026

ADHERING TO OUR ENEMIES: Iran’s Not-So-Subtle War on U.S. Morale and the Left’s Abetting of It.

YES: Teens Need Sleep. Schools Can Afford to Give It to Them. “Medical experts have been clear for years: sleep cycle changes during puberty make it hard for teenagers to learn in the early morning. Later school start times have been linked to better sleep, improved mental health, stronger academic performance and even safer driving.”

A FLOATING TREASURE TROVE OF DATA:

Holy $#*! Well my friends, I've managed to get in touch with brilliant international wildlife photographer Chris Bray on Christmas Island and he just grabbed some shots of Ship 40 for us! Take a look at this!🤯

Lot's more to come so follow him from the link. 👇 pic.twitter.com/zNJP68E1dy

— Marcus House (@MarcusHouse) August 18, 2026

ROBERT SPENCER: El-Sayed Oversaw Animal ‘Slaughterhouse,’ and This Is Not Just a Story About Killing Dogs. “Ultimately, the question is, when I die and I stand before God and go through everything I did in my life, I don’t want to say I did it the easy way instead of the Shariah-compliant way.”

DECLINE IS A CHOICE: Colorado regulatory burden, affordability drives business exodus.

Furman says 98 large businesses have left Colorado since 2019, taking nearly 14,000 jobs with them. These aren’t failed companies or departures caused by mergers and acquisitions, she explains, but companies relocating operations to other states, with Texas, Florida, Utah and Tennessee among the biggest beneficiaries of the Colorado exodus.

Furman points to burdensome employment mandates, energy and environmental rules, paid family leave and permitting hurdles as examples of regulations that individually may seem manageable, but collectively impose substantial compliance costs, especially for businesses without dedicated legal or human-resources departments.

The consequences are showing up in state rankings, with Colorado falling from 11th to 25th in overall business competitiveness. Furman notes Colorado still does well in areas such as technology, workforce and quality of life, but argues those strengths are increasingly giving way to affordability and regulatory problems.

Surely, the next round of taxes and regulations out of Denver will make it all better.