I HAVE CATS WHO’D MAKE BETTER PRESIDENTS THAN JOE BIDEN:  Running Mate Waiting Game, Joe’s Gonna Joe.

ALL COMMIES TOGETHER! (SUNG TO THE TUNE OF “SO HAPPY TOGETHER:”  Kasich To Team Up with Michelle O and Bernie.

Save me the arguments. If you’re teaming up with Bernie, you’re a commie. PERIOD. In a sane and just country, we’d buy you a one-way ticket to Cuba or Venezuela, and wave bye bye as you go….

SOMEONE ELSE SEES IT!   Wuhan virus — there are silver linings to this cloud.

AMERICA’S PAPER OF RECORD:  Biden Tells Staffers To Pick Any Black Person For VP ‘Since They All Think The Same Anyway’.

SAME AS IT EVER WAS:  Obama’s Deviousness, Trump’s Reliability.

THERE’S A LOT OF RUIN IN THIS COUNTRY, BUT I BET THEY CAN SPEED IT UP:  90 Days for Biden to Ruin the Country? ‘C’mon, Man!’

FUNNY WAY OF SPELLING “PLANNING”:  Are Democrats Pondering Civil War If Biden Loses?

HE’S NOT WRONG:   Trump Suggest NRA Move Following Lawsuit.

LET’S BE HONEST, THEY TARGET EVERYONE:  Portland Riots Now Target Older Women.

NO, NOT SIGNS OF LIFE, MERELY A WAY TO “SEE” OZONE – WHICH MIGHT BE A SIGN OF LIFE:  Hubble just made a major breakthrough in the search for alien life.

NOBODY HAS, AS YET, DIED FROM THOSE TOXIC WRAPPERS:  Fast-food wrappers at McDonald’s, Burger King may harbor toxic chemicals: report.

AND WITH BREXIT, TOO. WHEN THEY NEED HIM MOST. CIVIL SERVANTS THESE DAYS!  Paws for reflection: British Foreign Office cat to retire.

BEHOLD MY SHOCKED FACE:  Recently freed sex offender arrested in Boston on rape charges.

“SOPHISTICATED” APPARENTLY DOES NOT MEAN “COMPLETED”:  Feds discover ‘sophisticated tunnel’ along US-Mexico border.

WHO COULD FORESEE SUCH A THING? (OTHER THAN EVERYONE?):  Rape suspect released amid COVID-19 kills accuser: cops.

BECAUSE OF COURSE HE DID:  KDHE doctored a COVID case chart to justify mask mandates.

AMERICA’S PAPER OF RECORD:  ‘No, Joe! Spit It Out!’ Shout Aides As Biden Takes Huge Bite Out Of Cognitive Test.

SHOCKING RESEARCH REVEALS THIS ONE WEIRD TRICK TO IMPROVE COMPANY PRODUCTIVITY:  Employees perform better with a competitive workplace, study says.

WELL, WHY NOT? THEIR PRIME MINISTER & PARLIAMENT APPEAR TO BE DOING IT:  Terminally ill can take magic mushrooms in Canada, new law rules.

THE ENTIRE WORLD IS INSANE:  Mexico’s students to be homeschooled with television instead of in-person classes.

BE FAIR. IT’S NOT BIDEN’S. IT BELONGS TO WHOMEVER IS PULLING HIS STRINGS:  The Biden Backtrack.

HOW LONG WILL WE TOLERATE THIS?   Denver in Decay’ Will Capture Another City Rocked by Violence.

WE ARE UNABLE TO CONFIRM REPORTS THAT THEIR NEW UNIFORMS WILL BE IDENTICAL TO THOSE WORN BY ANTIFA DEMONSTRATORS:   The Department of Homeland Security says it will replace the military-style uniforms worn by its agents.

WAIT, BILLY THE RED IS DUMBER THAN FREDO’S BROTHER?  Andrew Cuomo Begs Rich Hedge Funders Fleeing NYC: ”Please come back!’ De Blasio disagrees.

AND AGAIN:  Trump Signs Executive Order to Reduce US Reliance on China for Medicine.