EVERYTHING HAS A PRICE:  Antidepressants: is the cure worse than the disease?

THE LEFT’S HATRED ONLY WITHERS THEMSELVES:  “Hate Chicken” and “Cow Shadenfreude”: The New Yorker Takes Aim At Chick-fil-A.

THINK LONG AND HARD BEFORE:  Putting your kids in public school.  Liberals reproduce by indoctrination.

MAYBE THE EYEBROWS YOU WANT AT 20 WON’T BE SUITABLE TO YOU AT 50 – SO WHY MAKE THEM PERMANENT?  The dark side of microblading.

WE’VE ALWAYS BEEN OPTIMISTIC ABOUT IMPROVING OURSELVES:  The reason Americans are obsessed with advice.

PENGUIN, WHAT?  STOP THE WORLD, I NEED TO STEP OFF:  Penguins might just be nature’s most perverted animals.

OH, SPOD (SWEET PLANET OF DEATH) YOU DISAPPOINT US YET AGAIN:  No, the Rapture Isn’t Coming on April 23 Because of Nibiru (Which Doesn’t Exist).

WELL… IT WAS AFTER ALL A MONITOR LIZARD:  Extinct monitor lizard had four eyes, fossil evidence shows.

BESIDES, YOU’D LOOK FUNNY WITHOUT THEM:  The evolutionary advantage of having eyebrows.

A) SOME COINCIDENCE  B) ALIENS!  Stonehenge may have been in place before humans arrived – archaeologist.  Additional note: whoever has been putting crack in the faculty lounge coffee stop it.  It’s not funny anymore.

THE… WHAT? Obama judge OKs lawsuit forcing companies to hire DACA recipients.

WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE:  Their World, Our World.

THE LEFT’S VENEZUELAZATION OF AMERICAN CITIES PROCEEDS APACE:  Liberal Cities Embrace Homelessness.  But it’s okay so long as they convince voters that actual competent people are racistsexisthomophobic.

AND YET IT SHOULD BE REMEMBERED, AND ITS IMPLICATIONS CONTEMPLATED:  Millenials Haven’t Heard of the Holocaust: True Or False?

WHEN THE AUTHORITIES DO THEIR JOBS:  The Mass Shooting You’ll Never Hear About.

PARENTAL INTERACTION? THAT’D NEVER WORK!  How to help your kid with ADD.

MEDIUM RARE IS RARE:  Restaurants are cooking your steak wrong on purpose.

REMEMBER POE’S LAW. LET’S GIVE IT 48 HOURS, PEOPLE:  Zuckerberg Loses Contact Lens During Senate Hearing Revealing Horrifying Lizard Eye.  (For the congenitally humor-impaired, note this is the Babylon Bee)

EVERYONE AND ANYONE CONNECTED WITH THE CLINTON CRIME MACHINE?   Guess Whose House Wasn’t Raided by the FBI.

UM:  Zuckerberg, Facebook and Skynet.

WILL THERE ALWAYS BE AN ENGLAND?  Dept. Of Righteous Killings.

OF COURSE SHE DOES – RELYING ON TALENT IS SO 20TH CENTURY: Janelle Monae wears vagina pants in new music video.  “No one takes me seriously,” lamented the feminist while dressed as a sexual organ.  (And for the love of heaven, will someone — anyone — teach these chicks* anatomy?  They’re embarrassing. What they’re wearing is the semblance of a vulva, not a vagina!  Are they so seriously stupid they define themselves for an organ  they misidentify?  It’s like going around saying you’re so important because you’re a painter while displaying a pen and pencil drawing as proof of your skill.)
*Chick in this case is a gender neutral term of derision.  I know several liberal males who are chickies.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS IS WELL AND GOOD BUT DELICIOUS CRISPY FRIED CHICKEN IS SOMETHIING ELSE ENTIRELY:  Teens are dumping McDonald’s for Chick-fil-A.

MIGHT THEY BE COOPERATING WITNESSES FOR THE INSPECTOR-GENERAL?  FBI lovebirds might be getting busy in other ways, too

THE LEFT’S HYSTERICAL MALEVOLENCE:  Washington Lies In a Parallel Universe.