AND YOU’RE PAYING FOR BOTH!  Kids Still In Cages; Nancy’s Going To Africa.

ATTENTION, COLORADO:

Click to embiggen.

AND ALSO:

Because otherwise I’ll never remember to tell anyone, or type the wrong date, or something…

LADIES, GENTLEMEN AND DRAGONS, I GIVE YOU THE BABYLON BEE, AMERICA’S PAPER OF RECORD:  Ilhan Omar Introduces Resolution Condemning Racism, White Men, And The Jews.

SURE, BUT NO ONE WILL HEAR OF THIS, UNLESS THE GOP MAKES AN AD OF IT. AND MAYBE NOT EVEN THEN:  Ted Cruz blows a hole in Google.

REST OF GOP PLEASE TAKE NOTE: YOU’RE ALLOWED TO GO ON THE ATTACK. IN FACT, AS IN FENCING, IF ALL YOU DO IS DEFEND, YOU’RE GOING TO LOSE:  Baltimore Ambush: Trump forces Democrats to defend the indefensible, again.

I KNOW THIS WILL BE A SHOCKER FOR EVERYONE, BUT TLAIB IS WRONG (AND PROBABLY INSANE):  Two perspectives on JUUL.

Among the many things I don’t understand about current democrats are their determined demonization of vaping, while they encourage everyone to smoke pot. I mean, I use neither, and frankly think if you can do without substances, you’re better off. I also believe you have the right to go to h*ll any way you choose to, and I’m not your mother.  (Unless I am, in which case, now you’re adults, I’ll frown very intently at you.)
But why love one and revile the other?  Except of course nicotine doesn’t lead to fuzzy thinking.

THIS IS NOT SNOPES’S FAULT. OR THE BEE’S FAULT. THE FAULT LIES WITH DEMOCRATS INCREASINGLY BEHAVING LIKE CRAZY PEOPLE:  Snopes is not amused…

I THINK THE UN IS AN INSTITUTION WHOSE TIME HAS PASSED:  The UN: through the Looking Glass and beyond.

OH, DEAR LORD. GUYS. YEAH, I HATED BEING KISSED BY MY GREAT GRANDMOTHER, BECAUSE SHE HAD CHIN HAIR. BUT THIS IS SILLY. NOT EVERYTHING IS SEXUAL:  Program says kids need to ‘consent’ to grandma kisses.

FUNNY. THAT’S PRECISELY HOW A LOT OF AMERICANS FEEL ABOUT “UNDOCUMENTED” IMMIGRANTS:  Hamptons homeowners are sick of ‘entitled’, ‘lecherous’ summer houseguests.

OF COURSE, THIS HAPPENED DURING A WEEK WHEN I’VE BEEN FIGHTING SOME VERY ODD VIRUS. FORTUNATELY I DIDN’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING, SINCE MY FANS GOT ALL WEAPONIZED OVER THIS. NONE OF THE PAGES TARGETED WERE DELETED. BUT…  GIVEN THAT NONE OF US ARE NEWBIES OR UNKNOWN, IT’S AMAZING THEY TRIED AT ALL:  Web Reference Giant “Wikipedia” Officially Changes Its Name to “The Memory Hole.”

NO WONDER THEY LOVE ILHAN OMAR. SHE OBVIOUSLY MOONLIGHTS FOR THEM:   CNN editor praised murder of ‘Jewish pigs’ in terrorist attack on Israeli bus.

WHAT THE ACTUAL…  Research facility sued after FBI finds buckets of heads and other body parts sewn together.

LOWEST COMMON DENOMINATOR:  School teachers are treating little kids like dummies.

WAIT. THERE WAS A DOUBT ON THIS?  Men who are ‘forced-to-penetrate’ are rape victims.

THEY HEARD VENEZUELA WOULD BE LOVELY IF ONLY IT WERE TRUE SOCIALISM:   The Demos’ Socialist Cloward-Piven Pivot.

IT’S LATER THAN YOU THINK. IF NOT NOW, WHEN?  This Little Light of Mine.

SURE. WHATEVER. BUT MOSTLY? VOTER FRAUD. MASSIVE VOTER FRAUD. WE EITHER CLEAN UP THE VOTING OR WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SHOOT OUR WAY OUT SOCIALISM:  How did the Squad get elected? And what’s the game plan to get more far leftists into the House?

Until we can, remember this simple plan: lie to pollsters. Lie like a rug. Tell them how much you love the most socialist candidate.  Vote on the day and either in person or (where that no longer happens) take your ballot in at the last possible moment.  If you have a ballot mailed to you and don’t use it, shred it. If they don’t know how many votes to fake, we might have a chance. Follow the plan like your life depends on it. It might.

I HOPE NOT, BECAUSE THE PRC WON THAT ONE.  OH, SURE, WORLD OPINION, BUT THEY REMAINED IN POWER:  The Hong Kong Protest Is Beijing’s New Tiananmen Square.

SAME AS THEY ALWAYS DO:  Democrats Use the Specter of Racism to Sow Racial Discord.

ABOUT TIME: Good riddance: Clinton-man governor of Puerto Rico is finally booted.

VERY MUCH AMEN:  The investigators need to be investigated.

MOST THOROUGHLY HOIST ON THEIR OWN PETARD:  DOJ Invokes Fast And Furious With Refusal To Prosecute Willam Barr For Contempt.

I DON’T KNOW WHO IS MORE DANGEROUS, BUT THE FOUR SOWS OF THE DERPOCALYPSE ARE MORE UNHINGED:  Progressives Versus Pelosi.

DEMOCRATS? FIX SOMETHING? YOU’RE ASSUMING ENTIRELY TOO MUCH COMPETENCE AND CONTACT WITH REALITY:  Mueller is Finished, So Democrats Fix Your Cities.