THE LEFT AND LANGUAGE:  Communication Disorders.

WHEN YOU’RE A SELF-EMPLOYED CONTRACTOR, YOU OFTEN FEEL LIKE THIS AROUND THIS TIME OF YEAR:

THEY’RE HIDEOUS IDES:  The Ides of April.

REALLY? I AIM TO MISBEHAVE:  Dems Insist Criticism Is Violence, and Also Violence Is Good.

I SUPPORT THIS. JUST THE MONTHS OF LIFE THEY STEAL FROM ANY SMALL BUSINESS OWNER WHO HAS TO KEEP TRACK OF EVERYTHING AND COMB THROUGH EVERYTHING? GETTING RID OF IT WOULD CAUSE A SUDDEN LEAP IN PRODUCTION. OR PERHAPS IN HAPPINESS: Abolish the Income Tax, Abolish the IRS.

IT IS AN OPEN SECRET THE NYT LIST IS CURATED. AT ONE TIME ONE OF THEIR BESTSELLERS WAS FOUND TO HAVE SOLD LESS THAN FIVE THOUSAND BOOKS:  Valerie Jarrett Accused of Manipulating Book Sales to Get On NYT Bestseller List.

OH, DEAR LORD:  London Protesters Glue Themselves to Things to Raise Awareness About Climate Change.

THIS IS MY SO VERY SHOCKED FACE:  Is Russiagate worse than Watergate?

IN TODAY’S EDITION OF INSTAPUNDIT’S FINANCIAL ADVISORY, WE WANT TO REMIND OUR READERS TO BUY POPCORN STOCKS. LOTS OF POPCORN STOCKS:  Democrats Take Aim At Themselves.

LOOK, ONE THING IS TRUE: HE KNOWS THEM. HE KNOWS THEM INTIMATELY AND DEVASTATINGLY AS ONLY SOMEONE WHO EITHER STEALTHED AMONG THEM OR WAS ONE OF THEM FOR YEARS CAN. IT WOULD BE LIKE ME DOING/SAYING THINGS TO DRIVE THE LEFT IN SCIENCE FICTION NUTS. I KNOW THEIR BUTTONS. (I JUST DON’T CARE ENOUGH TO PUSH THEM MOST OF THE TIME.) DONALD TRUMP IS THE TROLL WE NEEDED:  Trump Puts Democrats Between A Rock And A Hard Place On Illegal Immigration.

EVEN EUROPE — AT LEST THE PARTS I’VE BEEN TOO RECENTLY — DOESN’T HAVE ARMED GUARDS AT MCDONALD’S. WHAT’S CALIFORNIA, NOW? SOMALIA?  Naked man with knife shot by armed guard…at McDonald’s.

I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUES WITH WHATEVER ADULTS WANT TO DO TO THEIR OWN BODIES. I HAVE MY OWN OPINIONS ABOUT IT, BUT AS LONG AS THEY’RE NOT COERCED OR DOING THIS TO SOMEONE ELSE, IT’S NONE OF MY BUSINESS.  BUT I TOO AM TIRED OF THE ONGOING RAPE OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. RAPE IS NEVER OKAY. NO MEANS NO, AND SOME OF US ARE SCREAMING “NO” LOUD ENOUGH FOR THE ENTIRE CULTURE:  Reclaiming our language from transgender activists.

IT WILL STILL TAKE UNTOLD TIME AND RESOURCES TO FIX:  Notre Dame Survives, Mostly.

NO SUCH MAGICAL APPARATUS EXISTS! New Hearing Aid Allows Liberals to Hear Arguments for Concealed Carry.  (If IMAO.us were a paper they would rival the Babylon Bee as America’s paper of record, but this post is a triumph of hope over reality ;) )

IT’S THICK:  Clearing the Fog.

ARE YOU SURE? I THOUGHT IT WAS SANTA CLAUS:  Bernie Sanders to Model “Medicare for All” on Successful Easter Bunny Egg Program.

NEWSFLASH: BEING A BOY IS DIFFICULT:  ‘The Heart of a Boy’ is a beautiful celebration of boyhood.

THIS IS MY SHOCKED FACE:  ‘The Silence’ Casts Christians as the Real Monsters.

ONLY IN SANCTUARY CITIES:  “Spartacus” Booker Says Moving Illegals To Sanctuary Cities Makes Us ‘Less Safe’.

NUMMY, NUMMY HATE CHICKEN:  Chick-fil-a’s “Hate Chicken” Strikes Again.

NO, THEY JUST WANT TO DESTROY AMERICA:  Democrats Have No Interest In Illegal Aliens.

MOVIES WORTH SEEING ARE RARE THESE DAYS. MAYBE THEY ALWAYS WERE:  Movie Considerations & The Highwaymen.

BY THEIR FRUITS, THOU SHALT KNOW THEM: Ilhan Omar and the victimhood competition.

THOSE WITH AN UNEASY CONSCIENCE ALWAYS FEAR THE KNOCK ON THE DOOR:  At what Democrats thought would be their time of triumph, instead they fear a day of reckoning may come.

ENVY. IS THERE ANYTHING IT CAN’T DO?  Millionaire Bernie Sanders Denounces Greedy “Billionaires and Trillionaires”.