HOW HOWARD STERN BECAME THE MOST IRRELEVANT MAN IN MEDIA:

Stern has made more than Rush Limbaugh. More than Hannity, Beck, Imus, and Schlessinger combined. No radio talent has ever matched his checkbook.

For a time, he was so omnipresent in popular culture, that an article like this would never see the light of day. First of all, the premise alone would be preposterous — how the hell is Howard Stern irrelevant?! He’s everywhere! And second, journalists were terrified of Stern. If he turned his spotlight on you, it was brutal: His insanely loyal fans would terrorize you in public. Go ask Kathie Lee Gifford how fun it was to be caught in Stern’s crosshairs.

And really, that was the secret to his success: More than anything else, it was the connection Stern forged with his audience that made him so special. If he had an autograph signing or an appearance somewhere, thousands of his fans would huddle together in the pouring rain — waiting for hours — just to get a glimpse of their radio deity. His book “Private Parts” became the biggest literary smash-hit Simon & Schuster had ever published. His audience hung on to his every word. The emotional bond between him and his audience was unbreakable.

Or so we thought.

Then something strange happened: Howard Stern became the world’s first celebrity to go behind a paywall.

It was a clever move by Sirius: For satellite radio to succeed, they needed to figure out a way to convince audiences to pay for something that they’re accustomed to getting for free. So, if you’re Sirius, what’s the fastest, most efficient way to build a paying audience?

Answer: Find the biggest name in the talk-radio universe with the most loyal audience — fans so faithful, they’ll follow him anywhere — and sign him to an exclusive contract.

And that’s exactly what Sirius did. Stern left terrestrial radio and jumped to satellite in 2006.

Originally, this was pitched to his fans as an amazing new development for creative content: Before, Stern was limited by the FCC. Now, he’s finally free to do the show he’s always wanted to do — it’ll be wilder, crazier, and waaaay more explicit! Oh, can you imagine the antics Stern might pull without any risk of censorship?!

Does the wacky Stern 1.0 exist at all today? Between the clips of Stern fluffing celebrities on YouTube, Bruce Bower’s damning portrait of him in City Journal, in January of 2020, before the covid lockdowns, and Stern’s germophobic behavior since, that version of the definitive “shock jock” seems long gone. Stern tossing Biden the gentlest of softball questions in late April is yet another indicator that the once maniacal perpetual manchild is now just another cossetted megastar, arguably terrified of being cancelled over the past behavior that made him a household name in the 1980s and ‘90s.