21ST CENTURY RELATIONSHIPS: I’m in a sexual relationship with airplanes — so I go on vacation a lot. “Rodo, who said she’s spent nearly $4,267 on model airplanes, revealed that she identifies as objectum sexual. Yes, that’s a real thing. Also known as objectophilia, this particular love-match occurs when individuals develop strong sexual or romantic feelings for a specific inanimate object, according to a 2022 study published in the Spring Nature medical journal. Some academics have theorized that the condition could be linked with autism spectrum disorder.”

Sounds highly plausible.