DO YOU THINK ELSIE LEE, who graces my computer screen pretty regularly these days on a variety of sites, is really just an ordinary “Harris Direct investor,” or do you think she’s actually, like, a model they chose because she looks cute with a keyboard in her lap and her bare feet propped up on the desk next to the monitor?

UPDATE: Will Middelaer, it turns out, has been researching this for weeks and has exposed a troubling coverup effort at Harris Direct.