21ST CENTURY RELATIONSHIPS: What It’s Like to Visit ‘Dr. M,’ New York’s Erotic Masseur for Women.

I don’t have any sort of attachment to him, but he’s a comforting presence. I can focus on my pleasure and I don’t feel like “Ugh, god, I’ll have to spin around on his dick in return.”

Since I’ve been seeing him I’ve been calmer and I feel much less urgency with men. I don’t want to go out and have sex with a different guy every other night. It’s making me a little more selective. And I don’t have any of that sex anxiety like, “Ugh, do I have to sleep over?” Or, “Oh no, will he still be here in the morning?” . . .

I think for me the main appeal is that excitement that you’re going to be with someone for one hour who has no other purpose other than to please you. There’s nothing reciprocal. There are almost no other instances in your life where that holds true. You don’t have to smile. You don’t have to make anyone else feel good. There are few good things that happen to you in life that are quite so selfish.

The important thing is that, since this involves women getting off, it’s liberating and empowering, not tawdry and sleazy like it would be if it involved men.