I’M NOT DEAD YET. I THINK I’LL GO FOR A WALK! Dutch, British governments pay to keep Windows XP alive.

THE SINGULARITY ARRIVED SO GRADUALLY I BARELY EVEN NOTICED: “Contextually Aware” Messaging Assistant. “Created by Gummi Hafsteinsson, who previously worked on Apple’s personal assistant, Siri, and Dave Feldman, who ran the design team for Yahoo Messenger, Emu is like a more proactive text version of Siri that analyzes messages and adds helpful details for making plans. Emu was released Wednesday for the iPhone.”

A SOLAR-POWERED YACHT RACE.

PAY ATTENTION TO THOSE BENEFICIARY DESIGNATIONS: When Your 401K Has A Bad Heir Day. “Most Americans believe their retirement savings will be divided according to the instructions in their will—like their other assets. In fact, who inherits retirement money is usually determined by the language on beneficiary-designation forms that many people have long since forgotten or lost.”

FROM BRADLEY AREHEART AND MICHAEL STEIN: Integrating The Internet.

FREE SPEECH IN THE 21ST CENTURY: Floyd Abrams on the “Disturbing Recurring Reality” of Collective Liberty. What they want to destroy, they put under the collective.

Why is birth control not a “collective right,” to be decided for people by the community? After all, your reproductive decisions affect the community, not just you . . . .

TAXPROF ROUNDUP: The IRS Scandal, Day 333.

WHEN SEX DISPARITIES MATTER, AND WHEN THEY DON’T: Mind Which Gap? The Selective Concern Over Statistical Sex Disparities.

There are many statistical disparities between the sexes in our world, but only some become the subject of widespread concern. Ones that are perceived as favoring men are labeled “gaps,” while those that favor women are simply facts. Outside the workplace, men are arguably disadvantaged in a variety of arenas, whether in terms of health and longevity, crime and violence, domestic relations, or education. In the workplace, men are far more likely than women to be killed and to work long hours. None of these disparities is generally viewed as a “gap” deserving of intervention, however. Men earn a disproportionate number of Ph.Ds in some fields, while women earn a disproportionate number in others. Only the former set of disparities, however, is typically viewed as a “gap.”

Indeed.

Related: Once you impose the ‘ceteris paribus’ condition, the alleged 23% gender pay gap starts to quickly evaporate.

THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED: New Study: Concealed Carry Deters Murder.

SCIENCE: Debunking a Few Commonly Held Fracking Myths: Exploding sinks and liquid that flows upward.

I DON’T KNOW WHY THERE’S NOT A QUATRO DE CINCO SALE. At Amazon, It’s The Cinco De Mayo Sale.

Plus, deals galore on Top-Rated Products.

I WRITE IN POPULAR MECHANICS: 5 Privacy Laws I Would Put on the Books Right Now.

SALENA ZITO: Will Hubris Sink The Dems? If cockiness — or any one of a number of other faults — doesn’t sink the Republicans first.

CULTURE OF CORRUPTION: CFPB Director Told Whistleblower to ‘Back Down:’ ‘Pervasive culture of retaliation and intimidation’ at the Dodd-Frank office.

ED DRISCOLL ON DAVID LETTERMAN’S RETIREMENT: Stupid Interviewer Tricks: When it all went pear-shaped for Letterman.

YA THINK? Sen. Leland Yee case illustrates culture of corruption.

Related: You can’t make this up: CA Dem Asks Obama to End Import of ‘Assault Weapons’ in Wake of Yee’s Arrest. Elected Democrats are engaged in illegal gun-running. Solution: More gun laws for everyone else!

Also: California Senate: Inside the Corrupt Reality of Government: Legislators in the Golden State make Breaking Bad seem mild by comparison.

Plus: Lawmakers Propose Reforms To Regain Public Trust. Have you considered seppuku?

MICKEY KAUS: Jeb Bush’s Cunning Strategy. “He’s not running, but he’s making space for Marco Rubio. Look at it this way: The GOP establishment is desperate to suppress Tea Party conservatives and also obtain the immigration amnesty they believe will win Latinos and relieve them of the need to do too much rethinking in other areas. P.S.: The need to rehabilitate Rubio–-which means avoiding a big immigration fight, at least in 2015 and 2016–-would be one more reason the GOP establishment might feel it’s now-or-never for passing an immigration reform bill. That would help explain the increasingly desperate and sneaky (but possible successful) efforts to keep amnesty alive.”

Meanwhile, a different perspective here. But Kaus’s theory seems more likely, though what do I know?

UPDATE: More: “The problem is, Jeb Bush is another moderate like McCain and Romney, both of whom failed to deliver. There is no reason to think he’ll do any better.”

DIDN’T JOHN SUNUNU LOSE HIS JOB OVER LESS? Eric Holder defends using Justice Department airplane for 27 personal trips.

THE DIET SODA BUSINESS: “In freefall.”

THE WAGES OF BIGOTRY: Why Hillary Clinton can’t be president of Mozilla or the United States.

UPDATE: John Fund: The New Pitchfork Persecutors.

STANDING UP TO CENSORSHIP AND GROUPTHINK: “Don’t yell at me. But if you must yell, at least don’t do it in unison.”

Plus: “Pasternak’s humanistic message — that every person is entitled to a private life and deserves respect as a human being, irrespective of the extent of his political loyalty or contribution to the state — poses a fundamental challenge to the Soviet ethic of sacrifice of the individual to the Communist system.”

ADAM SHARP VISITS COMIC CON TO SEE IF everyone is signed up for ObamaCare. Lou Ferrigno is not amused.

I SAW THE HEADLINE AND THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO START PAYING WOMEN AT THE WHITE HOUSE THE SAME AS MEN. BUT NO. Obama moving again on equal pay.

STARK, RAVING RAHM: Rahm Emanuel, Unfiltered.