NO EXPERIMENT IS A FAILURE IF YOU LEARN SOMETHING, so my experiment with the Fre alcohol-free Merlot can’t be considered a failure. On the other hand, the wine was dreadful.

According to this description, “This soft, fruity red possesses the cherry-like fruitiness and smooth texture characteristic of the Merlot variety. . . . The result is a fruity, delicious beverage with the characteristic aromas and flavours of premium wine, yet with under 0.3% alcohol and fewer than half the calories.” Er, no. The closest thing I can compare it to is the (decidedly not alcohol-free) Night Train Express, not regarded as a premium wine anywhere, even outside of bus terminals. And a way to get even fewer calories is to just not drink it.

Oh, well, it cost $6.99 and as I told the Insta-Wife, “at the very least, I’ll get a blog post out of it.” And the very least it was!