June 29, 2026

I’LL TAKE HEADLINES FROM 1943, ALEX: How German trains became the shame of a nation.

When the 10pm service of Berlin’s U2 metro line failed to set off from the station, its frazzled driver finally snapped.

“Get away from the doors!” he bellowed, leaping out to berate a young woman as she pawed at the broken, flashing-red buttons on the side of the train. “Don’t touch the doors!”

Unbeknownst to the driver, who seemed to think the woman’s button-mashing had caused the breakdown, Germany’s entire rail system had just been crippled by a software glitch.

For the next two hours, hundreds of thousands of Germans were left stranded on platforms or sweltering in packed carriages as the metro, intercity and commuter networks all failed at once on Tuesday.

In some regions the delays lasted even longer, with passengers forced to seek out hotel rooms or sleep on benches in the train station.

You might think that travel chaos on this scale in Germany, a nation famed for its love of efficiency and punctuality, is unusual – but you would be sorely mistaken.

After decades of underinvestment, Germany’s crumbling rail network has become a source of national humiliation for a country that was once the gold standard in engineering.

Speaking of humiliating, Col. Hans Landa vants to know, are you are hiding any wallboxes under ze floor? Ve have ways of finding out! German State Media Campaign Against Air Conditioning as Country Faces Record Summer Heat.

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UPDATE: It’s good to be in the nomenklatura:

Posted at 4:55 pm by Ed Driscoll