ACE OF SPADES REVIEWS THE NEW DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS MOVIE:
This is a movie which has 90% fresh ratings from both critics and audience members — I think it’s 91% fresh from critics, 94% from audience — and scored a high A- rating from Cinemascore’s exit polls of people just leaving the movie at theaters.
It even got Critical Drinker’s seal of approval. Spoiler alert: He drops a small but fun spoiler in that.
It should have made more money — but Hasbro is a woke greedpit of shitlibs, and the writers of the movie openly bragged about how fun it was to “emasculate” the film’s male characters.
61% of this film’s audience were males, and I can guarantee you that at least half of the women going to the movie only went because their husband or boyfriend was going.
And the film-makers decided to brag about emasculating men for entertainment purposes.
Which isn’t even really true. The film is not that woke by 2023 standards, and the male heroes actually do come off as heroes.
It’s all fun and games baiting and disrespecting unfashionably straight cis white males, until you realize, oh, right, straight cis white males are our core audience. Maybe we shouldn’t have attacked them just before we begged them to come give us some of their straight cis white male money.
Seeing headlines along the lines of “The Dungeons & Dragons Movie Intentionally Emasculates Its Leading Men” likely caused lots of potential audience members to sit this one out, further causing movie theaters to struggle, post-pandemic and the related explosion in streaming platforms.
UPDATE (FROM GLENN): I saw it on a whim yesterday when a friend asked me to go with him since his wife wasn’t interested. It was a nice upbeat action movie, not super-believable but then it is a movie based on a fantasy game. I didn’t think the male characters were emasculated, though my friend said it did underscore his longstanding belief that Bards were basically useless characters. And yet that’s who kept the team together, so . . . Anyway, yeah, not bad and not emasculating. And really, writers who disrespect their audiences shouldn’t find further work.