BAN ALL THE THINGS: Bay Area will end sales of gas furnaces and water heaters.

The rules, approved by the Bay Area Air Quality Management District, are meant to reduce air pollution from some of the worst home-appliance offenders. The main pollutants targeted are nitrogen oxides, or NOx, which can cause acid rain and smog as well as increase risk for asthma and other respiratory diseases.

People will be able to repair their gas appliances if they break — but the rules take effect when existing gas-powered furnaces or water heaters no longer work and need to be replaced. New construction will also be required to have zero-NOx — effectively, electric — furnaces and water heaters.

Coming up next: Black market furnace and water-heater repairs, just like Harry Tuttle in Terry Gilliam’s Brazil.

Also coming soon: Black market Skittles.