THE CUOMO FAMILY MAGIC CORONAVIRUS CURE:

In the first of many plugs for naturopathic professionals and “friends,” Cristina [Cuomo] elatedly describes the arrival of what reads like a truck full of unpronounceable products delivered by one Dr. Roxanna Namavar, “who also does vitamin drips at home in the Hamptons,” dressed head-to-toe in coveted medical protective gear. This special delivery, Cristina recognizes, may not be in every reader’s budget so she suggests the next best thing: bathing in Clorox bleach.

“Here is a more affordable way of neutralizing heavy metals: Twice, I took a bath. I added ½ cup ONLY of Clorox to a full bath of warm water to combat the radiation and metals in my system and oxygenate it,” she suggests. “We want to neutralize heavy metals because they slow-up the electromagnetic frequency of our cells, which is our energy field, and we need a good flow of energy.” Yes, a good flow of energy. And lighter, brighter skin with every wash.

Related: ‘Please Think About Others:’ Chris Cuomo Pretends He Didn’t Break Quarantine Already.