ENDORSED: Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN.

It’s from the Babylon Bee, but this is perhaps their only piece of satire that will never become reality. Or as 1984’s Winston Smith said when he escaped the filth of Airstrip One for the spotlessly clean apartment of O’Brien, an Inner Party member, with Oceania’s ubiquitous two-way telescreen in his spacious main room:

As O’Brien passed the telescreen a thought seemed to strike him. He stopped, turned aside and pressed a switch on the wall. There was a sharp snap. The voice had stopped.

Julia uttered a tiny sound, a sort of squeak of surprise. Even in the midst of his panic, Winston was too much taken aback to be able to hold his tongue.

‘You can turn it off!’ he said.

‘Yes,’ said O’Brien, ‘we can turn it off. We have that privilege.’

The Outer Party and proles are not granted such privileges.