TORONTO CITY HALL WORRIES ABOUT THE “EPIDEMIC” OF MILLENNIALS WITH COFFEE CUPS:

Have you heard about the latest epidemic that the City of Toronto has to deal with?

No, it’s not a measles outbreak or a strange new infectious disease, it is worse than that.

People — specifically millennials — walking up and down the streets with coffee cups.

If you haven’t noticed the “epidemic,” Ward 8 Councillor Mike Colle certainly has.

“You know, I think it’s really an epidemic of these people wandering our streets with these coffee cups,” Colle told the city’s Infrastructure and Environment Committee.

As with San Francisco, New York, and London, it’s awesome to see a city solve all of the really big problems — crime, disease, terrorism, the homeless, drugs — to, at long last, arrive at the fine-tuning phase of creating utopia.

(Via Small Dead Animals.)