HAROLD STASSEN SMILES: The Hillary Clinton Political Comeback Begins Today!
Don’t worry, Democrats! Hillary Clinton is here to save the day!
In a blistering op-ed in today’s New York Times, Hillary Clinton officially launched her political comeback. The Clinton Express is back for one final mission.
And don’t be naïve. She’s eyeing the 2028 Democratic Party nomination.
It’s a comeback nearly a decade in the making. Ever since losing the 2016 election, the Clintons have been exiled to the political wilderness — just another relic from a long-forgotten era. Indeed, in an age of #MeToo and ideological purity, the Clintons were always a bad fit.
They were like the creepy old guy in the nightclub. Everyone else is 30 years younger, whereas the Clintons were still rocking bellbottom jeans and sideburns:
BILL: Hey, baby! Wanna see the back of my VW van?
GIRL: Eww, no thank you. I don’t have daddy issues.
But the #MeToo movement is now over. And you can’t truly understand the Democratic Party’s current mindset without appreciating how utterly and thoroughly traumatizing MAGA’s 2024 victory was to their psyche.
They warned us he was Hitler. They told us democracy was on the line. They even convicted him of dozens of felonies! And Trump STILL won the popular vote!
So now, the Democrats are working through the five stages of grief.
The Party of Youth™ has found their candidate!
