BOOK REVIEW: I ordered the book, The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can’t Stop Talking About the other day and read it. I have to say I was impressed. I’m not ready to tattoo “Let Them” on my arm like some of her readers but the book was helpful. I put it up the other day and commenters wondered if it was based on stoicism. The answer is “a little bit” but it is mostly based on using the “Let Them” theory calm your stress response down.

I know this sounds dumb, but as I read the chapter on how to do this, it made more sense. Mel Robbins, the author, gives an example of getting stressed on an airplane when a man behind her is sick and coughing loudly without covering his mouth. She has to speak at several conferences and is upset that he is going to get everyone sick. She asks the guy to cover his mouth but he coughs even more and doesn’t listen. What should you do in this case?

She says you could get angry, sick and stressed out, but why bother ruining your trip. Instead, she covered her mouth with her scarf and put on headphones to drown out the coughing. Instead of complaining about the guy, telling her friends or spouse about what an idiot the man was, she just thought “Let them”…cough. It saved her hours and days of stress and kept her calm while she went on her speaking tour.

I decided to try this technique as I went about doing errands over the past couple of days. My windshield wiper broke at the car wash? No big deal. “Let Me” stay calm and find someone to fix it. If they can’t? Let Them be busy and I can deal with it another day. Someone’s behavior is irritating you? “Let Them” be irritating and think about how you want to respond. Mostly, the book is about how not to let other people’s behavior control how you respond. Easier said than done but if you find yourself getting flustered or annoyed easily, it might help.