FINALLY: A Democrat autopsy from a Republican consultant.

Republicans have, very foolishly, engaged in “autopsies” after recent election losses. This election, it’s the Democrats’ turn! The Democrats will engage in a circular firing squad for the next couple of years, with all factions doing their best to gain the upper hand by giving their rivals the shiv in the jailhouse shower. Allow me, a Republican political consultant without a dog in this fight, to answer the pressing question: who will Democrats blame for the campaign that inconceivably allowed the bad Orange Man to win and the obviously superior Kamala and Clooney and Oprah to fail?

First, let’s start with the obvious — black voters. The people at DNC HQ will be furious that black voters did not obey instructions and vote 95 percent for Democrats. It’s outrageous, really, when you think of all the great things white liberals have done for black people: BLM yard signs, volunteering once a year at a soup kitchen and promising young black men that Kamala would help them open weed stores. Yet even though the Democratic Party freed the slaves (young Democrats believe this), soooooo many black people voted for Trump. Shockingly ungrateful.

Second, brown voters. After everything Democrats have done for the brown people, their thanklessness stings even worse. All Democratic leaders religiously say “black and brown” in all their talking points, and Democrats have even opened the border to appease and accommodate Hispanics (who swung by fourteen points to Trump). Appallingly, Hispanic voters, who are legal American citizens, don’t want open borders! White liberal women have generously hired brown people to do their landscaping, clean their houses and raise their children — and despite all that, Hispanics have the nerve to vote for Trump and other Republicans. Even more ungrateful!

While being a wholly satirical parody account, Titania McGrath is not messing about today: