ANALYSIS: ABSOLUTELY TRUE. America Thrives at the Interstate Exit. Buc-ee’s is about as pure a distillation of American capitalism as there has ever been.

Every manner of commercial snack known to man is sold at Buc-ee’s, from Funyuns to Snickers bars. But that isn’t significant.

What is significant is the Beaver Nuggets, perhaps the world’s best caramel corn sold in embarrassingly large bags. Or the more than 20 different flavors of beef jerky, available in delicatessen-style displays along the back wall (the Mesquite Peppered jerky and the Cherry Maple jerky were the two I fell in love with).

But the Buc-ee’s brisket tacos might just be the greatest convenience-store food ever invented.

All of the employees smile, hustle, and joke with the customers. There’s a Black Friday rush atmosphere to the place, and yet there is no line at the checkout counters, every single one of which is manned by a cashier who works efficiently and enthusiastically — and for a reason: Buc-ee’s pays their employees exceptionally well. A sign at the gas pumps advertises $18-an-hour wages for the lowest positions, up to $200,000 per year or more for a store manager.

It’s a capitalistic shangri-la. No better shrine to productive, happy prosperity has ever graced our beautiful planet. It’s a place that utterly trumps, somewhat hilariously so, all of the grifting and griping of the American Left.

There are no social problems at Buc-ee’s. Beef jerky knows no race, and brisket tacos know no gender. Beaver nuggets and fried pecans have no politics. And if you believe any of this harms the planet, we laugh at your derangement.

Greta Thunberg might just be fed to the beaver if she were ever to complain about a Buc-ee’s.

It might sound stupid to say it: this is about as close to heaven as roadside commerce can get.

Flashback: Episode Five of the Babylon Bee’s series from 2022, on a California couple moving to Texas, where Steve and Timpani discover that you can immanentize the eschaton: