ENDORSED: Apply 👏 the 👏 Social 👏 Justice👏 Playbook👏 to 👏 Jews.

Folks, it’s time to step up. It’s time’s up to do better. It’s not enough to “not be antisemitic.” We have to be actively anti-antisemitic. Anyone who is not actively anti-antisemitic is antisemitic.

We’ve seen the stunning success of similar online campaigns for Women, Black People, and Trans Folk in completely eliminating all prejudice and elevating mental well-being. It’s time to apply the same social justice playbook to Jews. There are specific ways to perform your support that all Jews are guaranteed to appreciate since Jews, like all other marginalized groups, can be treated as a homogenous people who famously agree on everything.

Here are ten ways to be an Ally to Jews:

Support Jewish-Owned Businesses

Forget DuckDuckGo: support businesses like “Google,” an impressive technology company based in Mountain View, California. Both founders of this quite large company are Jewish! Or financially empower companies like “Goldman Sachs,” an investment company founded by Jews 150 years ago. Can you say #ChaiAchiever?

Don’t forget to support Jews in STEM! This past summer, Universal released a film celebrating the national Yid-spiration, J. Robert Oppenheimer. However, we have to call out the film for portraying this Jewish icon with a non-Jewish actor. The Jewish community famously hates that, given the critical failures of productions like The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Maestro, Golda, The Wolf of Wall Street, and Life Is Beautiful.

Elevate Jewish Voices 

Jewish authors who could use your support include Philip Roth, Saul Bellow, Ayn Rand, Judy Blume, David Mamet, Isaac Asimov, and Gertrude Stein. It’s time to take these voices out of the dark and into the mainstream.

We need to celebrate Jewish contributions to the world of cinema: for instance, classics such as Bee Movie, which was both written by Jews and stars a celebrity many people may not know is Jewish, Jerry Seinfeld. Bee Movie is just one of at least dozens of films created by Jewish people.

Did you know the pianist in Billy Joel’s band is Jewish? We need to elevate Jewish voices like his, so they get the audience they deserve. Representation matters. Perhaps that is why so many Jews are agents.

Heh, indeed. Read the whole thing, you big macher, you.