JIM TREACHER: The Rules Wouldn’t Keep Changing If You Peasants Just Did What You’re Told at That Particular Moment.

We got some new COVID-19 rules yesterday. They were different than the rules we got the day before that, and I assume they’re different than the rules we’ll get tomorrow.

To recap:

1. Absolutely do not wear a mask
2. You must, must, must wear a mask or you’re killing Grandma
3. Don’t leave the house or you’re killing Grandma
4. If you can’t avoid leaving the house, stay at least six feet away from any other human being you see or you’re killing Grandma
5. Wash your hands 20 times a day
6. Do not touch your face or anything else, ever
7. Get vaccinated so you don’t have to wear a mask
8. You have to wear a mask even if you’re vaccinated
9. When the above rules change, and then change back, and then change back again, shut up about it or you’re a stupid MAGA-head
10. Don’t forget to vote Democrat.

As Glenn wrote on Thursday in the New York Post: No, Karen, we’re not masking again: A winning GOP message for 2022 & beyond.