AND SPEAKING OF NIGHTMARISH DYSTOPIAN FUTURES: The “Frork”…It Is Un-American And Clearly A Sign Of The End Times:

It’s an all-too-familiar scenario. A bit of ketchup drips from your hamburger onto your placemat, and you’re left with only one choice: to use your fingers and a few French fries to sop up the mess.

McDonald’s is here to change that with their new “uselessly useful” invention–a “frork.” Basically, it’s a fork. But instead of metal prongs, it sports three French fries.

Decline is a choice, America.