I HOPE WE’RE NOT TOO MESSIANIC, OR A TRIFLE TOO SATANIC, BUT WE’RE CNN, AND WE LOVE TO SCREW WITH THE NEWS: Not the Onion: CNN Does Christmas Report About Michigan Satanists.

The Onion at least tries to be intentionally silly.

Incidentally, aren’t there other fast-growing alternative religions in Michigan that CNN could be doing a timely report on these days?