THIS SOUNDS LIKE A BIG BANG THEORY PLOT: Antarctic scientists face breathalyser tests due to alcohol-fuelled fighting and ‘indecent exposure:’

Officials from the National Science Foundation told an audit of healthy and safety at the two US-run bases — McMurdo Station and the South Pole — that drinking has led to “unpredictable behaviour that has led to fights, indecent exposure, and employees arriving to work under the influence”, according to a report in Wired.

The agency is reportedly considering shipping several breathalysers to the isolated stations, which together house up to about 1,150 people, including scientists and support staff.

But such a move could potentially pose legal and administrative problems, as Antarctica is not US territory and it is not clear who would conduct the tests and what rights of appeal would be available.

Complicating matters further, the South Pole station is at a high altitude which could reportedly prevent the breathalyser tests from working properly.

The agency insisted that drinking was not out of control but it wanted to prevent alcohol-related problems.

Only one man could restore discipline to these out of control sub-zero scientific wastrels. Clearly, Capt. Stillman was shipped to the wrong edge of the world when the EM-50 urban assault vehicle project went pear-shaped.