“HONEY, WE ARE A SPECIAL FORCES COMPANY. WE ARE ALL ABOUT WORKPLACE VIOLENCE!”

We’re reminded of when the Massachusetts Army National Guard’s IT people (a more useless bunch of Massholes can only be found in the state’s welfare offices, on either side of the counter, but we digress) loaded up C 1/20th SF’s computers with context-sensitive (and we do mean sensitive) filters. Want to go to Safariland and order holsters? Barrett to get some spare mags and firing pins? You can’t do that.

This site is prohibited. Reason: weapons/violence.

So we called the oxygen thieves at the state HQ (which had just, grandly, renamed itself Joint Forces HQ because it was a nest of otherwise useless Air National Guard desk jockeys along with the Army National Guard drones), and asked them to kindly remove their hindranceware from our computers. It quickly emerged that they didn’t really know how to operate the filters, and they weren’t very interested in learning, and anyway, they told us:

It’s part of the Adjutant General’s fivety-leven point plan to end workplace violence.

We had a ready reply:

Honey, we are a special forces company. We are all about workplace violence!

But no, that didn’t make an impression. Some bureaucrat from the 90% of the Army that’s flat cold terrified of firearms was going to continue to stand in the way of the 1% that actually gets an enormous kick out of using them. So, like the fabled Internet, we routed around the damage by using private computers and a wireless/cellular internet connection.

Welcome to the combat arms! This is a violence-free workplace. Lord love a duck.

Heh, indeed.™

(Via Ace of Spades.)