MORE THAN YOU PROBABLY KNEW about the history of steak knives.

MIKE STOPA: Gridlock Better Than Bad DACA Deal. “The basic problem with trading amnesty for so-called ‘Dreamers’ (illegal aliens brought to America as children) for increased enforcement of laws against illegal immigration and greater border security is that those aims are fundamentally in contradiction.”

THE OBVIOUS SOLUTION IS A LIFESAVING NATIONAL PROGRAM OF COSMETIC SURGERY: Dissatisfaction with breasts may mean fewer self-checks for cancer. “Women who are unhappy with the size of their breasts — whether too big or too small — may be less likely to perform self-exams to check for signs of breast cancer, new research suggests. These women are also more likely to put off seeing a doctor if they do find a suspicious lump in their breast, the study found.”

AT AMAZON, January savings on cold-weather gear.

Plus, deals in Household Supplies.

WHY IS THE DEMOCRATIC LEADERSHIP SUCH A CESSPIT OF RACISM AND SEXISM? Hoyer calls Pelosi’s ‘five white guys’ remark offensive. She doesn’t seem quite right lately.

FLASHBACK: 5 Key Elements You Need for a Kick-Ass Action Movie.

“Chinese audiences” is not one of them.

PETER THIEL KNOWS WHAT IS BEST IN LIFE. Okay, “the lamentations of Glenn Greenwald” doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, but close enough.

THE LEFT: CONSENT IS ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL.

Also the Left: If you don’t want to kiss the people we want you to kiss, you’re a bigot and must be destroyed.

ON UNDER THE ROCKS: Mars hides thick sheets of ice just below the surface.

The newer Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter mapped the surface in greater detail. Dundas and his colleagues used its pictures to locate exposed ice in small craters, glaciers and ice sheets. “The high-resolution data has greatly improved our understanding of various ice-related land forms,” he said.

These cliffs are “rare peeks into the subsurface of Mars, giving us access to an undisturbed slice through Mars’s ice in the mid-latitudes — a fantastic find!” said Susan Conway, a planetary scientist at the University of Nantes in France who was not involved with this research.

That will come in handy.

KURT SCHLICHTER: Oprah Will Run In 2020 Because All The Other Democratic Candidates Are Even Worse. “If I was a Democrat, like everyone at NBC and noted Cruise Director Bill Kristol, I’d want Oprah Winfrey to run for president too. She’s got all the qualifications to be a Dem candidate – she’s vacuous, she embraces all the required liberal taboos, and she hates the right people – that is, people like you. And, best of all, Oprah isn’t one of the horde of weirdos, losers, and mutations already threatening to run.”

YOUR DAILY TREACHER: Hitting a Person Is Wrong, Even if the Person Is Harvey Weinstein.

HEALTH: He was 21 and fit. He tried to push through the flu — and it killed him.

Don’t mess around with the flu.

THE 21st CENTURY ISN’T WORKING OUT THE WAY I HAD HOPED: Woman returns dead Christmas tree to Costco — in January.

More details here: “Surprisingly, Costco did issue the woman a refund, Bentely said in his post. The woman still hasn’t been identified; however, she did give shoppers on social media a new idea for next year.”

AREN’T WE JUST EXPORTING AMERICAN CULTURAL NORMS AND IMPOSING THEM ON OTHER NATIONS WITH DIFFERENT WAYS? Italian judge forced to step down. Well, I guess he went beyond even an expansive reading of la dolce vita: “Italy’s Council of the State, the country’s top administrative justice body and where Bellomo works, is investigating allegations that Bellomo used his authority to have sex with female students. That itself is not illegal in Italy, according to the Washington Post. But when the female students tried to break off their relationships with Bellomo, he allegedly put private information about their lives in the school’s academic journal or threatened them with frivolous legal action, the Post reported.”

“GENERAL, IF I AM A MODEL PRISONER DO YOU THINK SOMEDAY I COULD EMIGRATE TO AMERICA?” Mattis Reveals Personal Side in Visit With Troops, Recounts Meeting With Insurgent Who Tried to Kill Him.

Read the whole thing.

BIPARTISANSHIP: Republican and Democratic State Senators Admit Affair After They’re Allegedly Caught on Video.

THEY SHOULD RENAME IT THE SHARK-CLASS: US Navy’s next amphibious warship to get laser weapon.

IT’S COME TO THIS: “Country singer Dolly Parton has discarded ‘Dixie’ from the name of a popular dinner show, ‘Dolly Parton’s Dixie Stampede,’ due to cultural concerns.”

METAPHOR ALERT: Penn Station’s new concourse is already falling apart.

FROM CAR AND DRIVER: 2018 10 Best Trucks and SUVs: The Best Models in Every Segment.

AT AMAZON, save on Vitamins and Dietary Supplements.

Plus, save on Snow Removal.

PAUL RYAN: Without entitlement reform “we are hosed.”

Yep.

METAPHOR ALERT: Power Outage Brings Consumer Electronics Show To A Standstill.

MICHAEL WALSH: To Fix Washington, D.C., We Must First Destroy It.

Nuke the entire site from orbit; it’s the only way to be sure, as a wise woman once said.