BUT OF COURSE: Women are getting designer nipples to look more like Kendall Jenner. “I think it would be really cool to just have protruding nipples all the time.”

NON-SHOCKING HEADLINE OF THE DAY: Balanced Budget Amendment Mirroring 1995 Effort Fails to Get Two-Thirds in House.

Plus: “Our extraordinary fiscal crisis demands an extraordinary solution,” says sponsor Goodlatte as CBO projects deficit spending will increase $11.7 trillion over the next decade.

And that’s without a recession or a major shooting war or some other crisis — which is an awfully long time to go without at least one or two of the three.

JAMES COMEY: WHY, NO, I DIDN’T TELL TRUMP THE DOSSIER MATERIAL CAME FROM RESEARCH FUNDED BY HILLARY CLINTON.

WHISTLE BLOWERS: Conservative group claims university banned them for fliers allegedly exposing anti-Semitism on campus.

QUESTION ASKED: In the Era of #MeToo, Why Does Hip-Hop Get a Pass?

I’D DO IT JUST FOR KICKS: Do Democrats have to toss Nancy Pelosi overboard in order to take the majority?

Pelosi is already used as a liberal bogeyman by Republicans, hoping to hurt Democratic candidates between the coasts by tying them to the minority leader. After Lamb’s victory, Politico reported that “a half-dozen Democratic House members and candidates” told the outlet “they had been closely monitoring how Lamb handled the Pelosi attack.”

“A campaign manager for a Democratic candidate in a Republican-held district, granted anonymity to candidly discuss party strategy, said there’s a ‘100 percent chance that we’ll see more rejection of Pelosi from [Democratic] candidates going forward,'” Politico reported, quoting an additional Democratic strategist as saying, “Two things will happen: More Democrats are going to say they don’t support Pelosi, and Republicans will keep airing these Pelosi TV ads.”

Pelosi is a convenient — and real! — boogeyman, and her health appears to be slipping. But she does still control access to Bay Area/Silicon Valley Dem donors, which keeps her formidable no matter what.

ANTISOCIAL MEDIA: Backpage CEO Carl Ferrer pleads guilty to conspiracy, money laundering.

SAFE SPACES FOR REASONED DISCUSSION: UCLA law professor Richard Sander visited Middlebury College last week at the invitation of College Republicans. Good for him.  And kudos to the College Republicans for having the intestinal fortitude to insist bringing in a distinguished, conservative speaker with something to say. Conscientious students must not let the campus brown shirts win. If they shout down one speaker who they find offensive, invite three more in their place. The more people outside of colleges and universities hear about it, the better.

Sander is the leading academic researcher on the topic of “mismatch” (though Thomas Sowell coined the term long ago). For a primer on mismatch, try A Dubious Expediency: How Race-Preferential Admissions Policies on Campus Hurt Minority Students.

ROGER SIMON: Why I Won’t Read James Comey’s Book.

Unlike Comey’s book, read the whole thing.

STEPHEN KRUISER: The Definitive 10-Tweet Sampler of Reactions to James Comey’s New Book. “David Hogg for the older crowd…”

BLUE WAVE? Republican holds 10-point lead in Arizona special election.

HIGHER EDUCATION BUBBLE UPDATE: Yale to host rapper who sings about violent sex, deep throating, 8-year-old’s vagina. Hey, it’s not like she suggested that Halloween costumes aren’t actually offensive.

VIDEO: Pelosi suffers face spasms, says wrong words during brief appearance.

WELL, THAT’S CREEPY: This went unnoticed, but if you want something about which to develop a new conspiracy theory, this is a doozie.

Sources have reported that infamous billionaire and registered sex offender Jeffrey Epstein’s private island located in the Caribbean has recently caught on fire […] Notable public figures, such as former President Bill Clinton, have been reported to travel with Epstein on his ‘Lolita Express’ to various places, including this private island.

That’s one hell of a way to destroy evidence!

WINNING: U.S. Weekly Jobless Claims Hold Below 300,000 for Longest Streak on Record.

The current streak eclipsed the previous longest stretch that ended in April 1970. Taking into account the size of the labor force, claims today compared to the late 1960s and early 1970s are much lower. In March, about 14 initial jobless claims were filed for every 10,000 people in the labor force, Labor Department data show. This compares with 23 claims filed per 10,000 in spring of 1969.

This year, about twice as many people are in the labor force as in 1969.

That’s big. Although I wouldn’t mind seeing the official U-2 unemployment rate actually go up, if it meant that more people were finally re-entering the workforce after years of despair.

HIGHER EDUCATION BUBBLE UPDATE: Black conservative shouted down for speaking ‘against own people.’ “Students protesters heckled and repeatedly shouted over former NFL star and conservative commentator Burgess Owens when he gave a speech at at Hobart and William Smith Colleges. One student derided Owens as an Uncle Tom, while other protesters asked him accusatory questions and then shouted over him as he attempted to answer.”

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LIZ SHELD’S MORNING BRIEF: Scooter, Comey, Pompeo and Much, Much More.

CHANGE: Breaking: Referendum to Split Calif. Into 3 States Will Be on Ballot.

Say, did I mention I have a paper on state secession?

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: My latest Creators Syndicate column.The Indo-Pacific Quad Confronts China.

In 2007, The Quad (Quadrilateral Security Dialogue), at the behest of Japan, held its first informal meeting. The Quad’s membership roll sends a diplomatic message: Japan, Australia, America and India. Japan pointed out all four nations regarded China as disruptive actor in the Indo-Pacific; they had common interests. Delhi downplayed the meeting, attempting to avoid the appearance of actively “countering China.”

No more. The Quad nations now conduct naval exercises and sometimes include a quint, Singapore.

I doubt this column is on The Confucius Institute reading list. (Spelling error corrected — shouldn’t post before coffee.)

NAVY F-35C FLIGHT TEST: An F-35C Lightning II (the aircraft carrier version) makes a test flight with external weapons. Photo snapped April 4.

REPORT: The Internet has serious health problems, Mozilla Foundation report finds.

The Internet Health Report, which evolved from a prototype launched in January of 2017, is not a medical chart for the Internet packed with metrics. Edited by Solana Larsen and written by Mozilla Foundation research fellows, the report is an evaluation of “what’s helping and what’s hurting the Internet,” and it focuses on five broad areas of concern—personal privacy and security, decentralization, openness, “digital inclusion,” and general Web literacy. And Facebook’s part in the health of the Internet is writ large across the report.

Of particular concern were three issues:

• Consolidation of power over the Internet, particularly by Facebook, Google, Tencent, and Amazon.
• The spread of “fake news,” which the report attributes in part to the “broken online advertising economy” that provides financial incentive for fraud, misinformation, and abuse.
• The threat to privacy posed by the poor security of the Internet of Things.

The foundation’s report isn’t all bad news—it highlights progress in affordable access and the adoption of cryptography. But the cautionary notes outweigh the optimistic ones, especially on the topic of consolidation of control over Internet content and collection of personal data.

Break out of the social media silos and support your local blogs!

HOWIE CARR: Come clean on FBI frame-up, Bob Mueller. “What did Bob Mueller know about the FBI’s framing of four innocent men for a murder they didn’t commit, and when did he know it? This is an important question for the ‘special counsel,’ and for two days I’ve been emailing his press office, asking for answers about his tenure in the U.S. attorney’s office here. No response. Zip, zero, nada.”

Plus: “In 2013, the Boston Globe also reported the existence of a Mueller letter. The Parole Board now cannot find it. I found other two U.S. attorneys’ letters in the state archives — but none from Mueller. The special counsel’s office is not commenting. So let me ask the question again: Mr. Mueller, what did you know about the framing of four innocent men for a crime they did not commit? Did you ever write any letters demanding that the parole board not correct this gross miscarriage of justice? When did you find out that the FBI office in Boston was in the business of framing innocent men on behalf of their serial-­killing, cocaine-dealing underworld paymasters? And what exactly did you do about it when you ran that agency for eight years?”