I’M SHOCKED, SHOCKED:  UVA Won’t Recognize Conservative Student Group That Insists Members Be Conservative.

ADVICE FOR THE PRESIDENT, FROM KURT SCHLICHTER: Don’t Fire Mueller, President Trump – Let Him Keep Making A Fool Of Himself Instead.

I LOST ACTUAL IQ POINTS READING THE TOM HANKS QUOTE: I think the man might believe the Constitution is something newspapers publish.  Or perhaps something you eat with onions.  Makes about as much sense as what he said.   Democracy dies in dimness.  Hey, Mr. Hanks, there is a reason you get paid for mouthing other people’s words.  Let’s keep your speech to that, okay?  And no, not the Washington Post’s words.  They ain’t none too bright, either.

WHEN DID THE GERMANS BECOME AMERICAN DEMOCRATS:  Or American democrats become Germans.  Life is very confusing, right now.  Germans Fear Tax Cut Will Spur US Investment and Growth.  Would shipping Rosie O’Donnell to Germany be considered an act of war?

HE’S TURNING OUT SO MUCH BETTER THAN I COULD EVER HAVE DREAMED:  Trump Threatens to Cut Foreign Aid to Countries That Vote to Forbid the US from Recognizing Jerusalem as Israel’s Capital.

I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I’VE PREPARED FOR THE APOCALYPSE RESULTING FROM PEOPLE GETTING TO KEEP SOME MORE OF THEIR OWN MONEY BY COLLECTING RECIPES ON HOW TO COOK MY NEIGHBORS!  Tax Bill Passes, Democrats Cry “Heist!” Seriously, is anyone else tired of the “Wha, if we don’t have punitive taxation for the rich, civilization will fall!”  Idiots, fools and economic illiterates.  Moral illiterates, too.

BECAUSE THE MOTHERSHIP FROM PLANET DERP IS LATE FOR A PICKUP:  Why is Rosie O’Donnell still here?

PARENTS THROW TANTRUM AND NEED A TIME OUT:  Parents upset over Ivanka’s surprise visit to high school.

WHAT DO THEY MEAN, WE? AND THE PLANET’S NAME IS BARSOOM!  Mars could be more otherworldly than we thought.

PEOPLE MAGAZINE’S HEADLINE FOR CHAPPAQUIDDICK TRAILER SENDS HEADS TO DESKS: “Watch Ted Kennedy’s Life Get Derailed in Exclusive Chappaquiddick Trailer.”

Ted. Kennedy’s. Life. Wait ‘til People discovers what happened to Mary Jo Kopechne that night.

HEY, THERE’S A HARRY REID CHRISTMAS TOY. Who knew?

ENJOY TONIGHT’S OPEN THREAD!

I GUESS THAT’S JOB SECURITY: The Only McLaren F1 Technician in North America: In a secret location in a windowless warehouse, Kevin Hines of McLaren Philadelphia is the only person in the US certified to work on your F1.

OUCH: Tim Scott is Not Here For Your White Savior Complex. “HuffPo writer Andy Ostroy decided to rudely but unsurprisingly label Scott as a token and a puppet after watching the GOP White House celebration of the historic tax cuts passed on Wednesday.”

Spoiler: It did not end well for him.

JOAN VENNOCHI DARES TO SAY IT: “There is a big difference between patting someone on the rear and rape or child molestation.”

What’s troubling is that we’re in a moment where saying that is daring and controversial.

HMM: Judge declares mistrial in Bundy Ranch standoff case. “A federal judge has declared a mistrial in the case against Nevada rancher Cliven Bundy, saying U.S. prosecutors willfully withheld critical and ‘potentially exculpatory’ evidence from the defense.”

That’s serious misconduct. I hope they face discipline for that.

CHANGE: With end to polio in sight, vaccination gets creative.

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CRIME AND PUNISHMENT: Showing an advance copy of your story to a subject for approval is a cardinal sin of journalism. But it paid off handsomely for Glenn Thrush, who used his obsequious charms on the Clinton Machine to land himself a plum gig as a White House reporter for The New York Times. But the rules of journalism pale in comparison to exposing your employer to a potential sexual harassment lawsuit: “New York Times reporter Glenn Thrush to be dismissed from White House beat after suspension” reports Business Insider.

“The sexual misconduct allegations against Thrush come amid a wave of similar reports from women spanning a multitude of industries in recent months, many of which included bombshell original reporting from The Times’ own staff.”

An abuse victims’ lawyer could really go to town on the company in a civil suit if it could be shown they knew about it and ignored complaints. Editor Dean Baquet said in a statement that “While we believe that Glenn has acted offensively, we have decided that he does not deserve to be fired […] Each case has to be evaluated based on individual circumstances. We believe this is an appropriate response to Glenn’s situation.”

To my mind, that’s laudable, because the instantaneous reaction to such allegations seems to have veered off the Due Process rails, and people are being fired without so much as an opportunity to address the allegations.

HEY, HOW ABOUT THAT? AT&T is giving $1,000 bonuses to 200,000 employees after tax bill.

Plus: Boeing CEO Dennis Muilenburg unveils $300M in initiatives in response to tax bill.

And: Wells Fargo, Fifth Third Bancorp unveil minimum wage hikes after tax bill passage.

UPDATE: Instant Boom: Five American Businesses Announce Major Bonuses For Employees Because Of Trump Tax Reform. “Five American businesses announced on Wednesday that they would both be investing hundreds of millions of dollars in their employees because of Republican tax reform bill that the Senate passed on Tuesday night.”

NEWS YOU CAN USE: Why the government is creating lethal viruses.

ANOTHER BAD YEAR IN CONGO: The situation is tragic. Note on December 7 in Congo’s North Kivu province the deadliest attack UN peacekeepers occurred since 1994 when 24 Pakistani peacekeepers were killed in Somalia. The militant Islamist Allied Democratic Forces (ADF) terrorist group conducted the criminal attack. The ADF is a psycho outfit that is nominally Ugandan. It has bases in eastern Congo.

HEALTH: FDA issues tougher warning, additional research on MRI dye.

NEWS YOU CAN USE? 7 Mistakes Women Make with Men.

BREAK IT UP: YouTube Temporarily Bans Europeans from Viewing Cernovich Documentary on Migrant Rape Crisis.