REPORT: UNITED AIRLINES PILOT DUMPS LIVE AMMO INTO PLANE’S TOILET:

A United Airlines captain reportedly disposed of live ammunition into a Boeing 767′s toilet en route to Germany from Houston on June 24. United Airlines refuses to comment on the incident.

The captain of United Airlines Flight 133 reportedly realized he had live ammunition in the cockpit, ammunition which could not be brought into Germany. His solution?

Leave the cockpit during the flight and dump it into the waste bin of the lavatory of the 767.

A flight attendant discovered the live ammunition in the waste bin and alerted… the captain.

No word yet if the pilot had…a fistful of travellers’ cheques, as well.

(Apologies for the incredibly obscure British comedy reference in that previous link.)

AUTONOMOUS VEHICLES: Why Automated Taxis Could Mean Far Lower Emissions: Besides upending an entire sector of employment, self-driving taxis could have significant environmental benefits. Fewer working-class jobs, and lower emissions? It’s a Green twofer!

THE IRAN DELUSION: A primer for the perplexed.

ELECTRIC CARS: Volkswagen Promises Battery Breakthrough for Electric Cars (And a Weird Little Scooter).

‘IT’S LIKE CHRISTMAS’: WEALTHY GREEKS GO ON SPENDING SPREE FOR APPLE GADGETS AND JEWELLERY AS THEY FEAR THEY’LL LOSE CASH WHEN BANKS COLLAPSE:

Wealthy Greeks have embarked on a luxury spending spree amid fears the government will raid their bank accounts to help pay the national debt.

Jewellery, computer and electrical goods store reported record summer sales in the lead up to and following the EU bail-out referendum on Sunday which has put Athens at odds with Berlin and Brussels.

Greeks fear will the EU will force their government to impose a ‘haircut’ on their bank accounts, taking a percentage of depositor’s savings as a one-off tax, in a move similar to conditions imposed on Cyprus following their own financial crisis in 2013.

One shop assistant described the recent shopping spree as like ‘Christmas’.

Which adds a Continental twist that dovetails nicely with P.J. O’Rourke’s observation a quarter century ago in – appropriately enough — Parliament of Whores that “I have only one firm belief about the American political system, and that is this: God is a Republican and Santa Claus is a Democrat:”

God is an elderly or, at any rate, middle aged male, a stern fellow, patriarchal rather than paternal and a great believer in rules and regulations. He holds men accountable for their actions. He has little apparent concern for the material well being of the disadvantaged. He is politically connected, socially powerful and holds the mortgage on literally everything in the world. God is difficult. God is unsentimental. It is very hard to get into God’s heavenly country club.

Santa Claus is another matter. He’s cute. He’s nonthreatening. He’s always cheerful. And he loves animals. He may know who’s been naughty and who’s been nice, but he never does anything about it. He gives everyone everything they want without the thought of quid pro quo. He works hard for charities, and he’s famously generous to the poor. Santa Claus is preferable to God in every way but one: There is no such thing as Santa Claus.

In Europe, Nietzsche and his fellow “bearded God Killers” finished Him off by the end of the 19th century. And in postwar Greece, Nietzsche’s Last Men have done their best in the years since to finish off what remains of the European welfare state. As Mark Steyn warned a decade ago, “The hyper-rationalism of post-Christian Europe turns out to be wholly irrational: what’s the point of creating a secular utopia if it’s only for one generation?”

RELATED: “The Greeks have their Bernie Sanders. What they need is their Chris Christie.”

WELL, THIS IS THE 21ST CENTURY, YOU KNOW: US Army installing 15 MRAPs with IED blasting lasers.

SLASHDOT: Which Expert Bloggers Do You Read? Meanwhile, I’m surprised they’re not all over the NYSE, United, and WSJ issues.

WELL, WE CERTAINLY NEED SOMETHING: This New Drug Could Dramatically Reduce Obesity.

FIRST UNITED AIRLINES, NOW THIS: Trading halted on NYSE floor. “Trading in all symbols was halted on the New York Stock Exchange floor Wednesday due to an apparent technical issue.”

UPDATE: Also, the Wall Street Journal. Though it’s back up now.

ANOTHER UPDATE: “Would this be a bad time to suggest more electronic voting machines?”

MORE: Today’s glitches are imitating the plot of ‘Die Hard’ 4. So we’re living in a Christmas movie? Oh, wait.

NEWS YOU CAN USE: Adobe Flash exploit that was leaked by Hacking Team goes wild; patch now!

TAXPROF ROUNDUP: The IRS Scandal, Day 790.

WILL MOSHE SOON BE ABLE TO MARRY BINYAMIN? What are the prospects for gay marriage in Israel?

UBER EXPANDS in emerging markets.

Uber’s rapid and unprecedented growth since it began to operate internationally in 2012 has caused it to clash with regulators in developed and emerging markets alike. As a herald of the new sharing economy, anti-Uber movements like those in France last month often seem to be underlaid with protectionist and anti-market sentiments. Uber’s low-cost offering, UberPop—which doesn’t require drivers to have any special certification or licenses—has already been banned in Spain, Germany, Italy, and the Netherlands, and faces scrutiny nearly everywhere it operates.

As authorities in Hyderabad appear willing to find a suitable framework to accommodate the ride-sharing company, Mexico City is similarly trying to find balance between allowing Uber to operate freely and demands that it be expelled from the city entirely. For its part, Uber says it is willing to work towards “[r]egulation that allows us to continue to provide service that is quality, safe and efficient.” Indeed, these should be the only criteria that legislators have in mind when pondering how to regulate the burgeoning sharing economy.

An excellent approach, but one that offers insufficient opportunities for graft.

OBAMA ADMINISTRATION SLAPDOWN! IN IMMIGRATION CASE: Federal trial judge Andrew Hanen on Tuesday issued an order directing the defendants–including Department of Homeland Security Jeh Johnson–to appear personally before him on August 19 to explain why they should not be held in contempt. The basis for possible contempt is DOJ’s willful violation of Hanen’s injunction against further enforcement of President Obama’s unilateral executive actions on immigration:

“JOBS, JUSTICE, CLIMATE” PROTESTERS ADMIT TO OWNING CARS, FLYING — WHILE UNION-RENTED SCHOOL BUSES IDLE NEARBY, in new video by Ezra Levant:

As usual, none of the protesters I spoke to could clearly articulate why they were there or what they believed in, after they ran out of their rehearsed talking points.

When asked simple questions, they got flustered and even hostile.

I was shoved a bit, and even got called “the devil” by an atheist!

Wait, you mean the fella to which Saul Alinsky dedicated Rules For Radicals?

WELL, YES, THIS IS WHAT PUTIN DOES: Is Putin playing puppetmaster in Greece?

Rumors of Russian money and influence calling the shots in Athens—or at least playing an outsized role—are no secret in NATO security circles. That Putin wants to harm Greece’s already precarious links with the EU and NATO is plain to see, and it seems to be getting close to fruition as the Greek crisis worsens.

“They’re only technically on our side,” explained a retired CIA officer with long experience in Greek matters. U.S. intelligence has never fully trusted the Greeks, with the CIA especially having misgivings stemming from the 1975 murder of Richard Welch, the agency’s station chief in Athens. While Langley blamed Phil Agee, a former CIA officer who went over to the Cubans and Soviets—think of Agee as the Ed Snowden of the mid-1970s—for Welch’s death, it was long obvious that Athens was never very eager to catch Welch’s killers. Neither did the 1988 terrorist assassination of the U.S. naval attaché to Greece, Capt. Bill Nordeen, promote trust.

Ties between U.S. intelligence and the Greek security services suffered for years, and things are getting unpleasant again. “We’re back to square one,” rued the former CIA case officer. “It’s like the bad old days when we didn’t trust the Greeks and they didn’t trust us. Only now Putin’s in the middle of the game.”

Reagan won the Cold War, in part, by playing a long game designed to bankrupt the Soviet Union. It seems Putin now has similar aims, using the profligacy of European socialist countries such as Greece as a long-term weapon. Such profligacy holds the potential to bankrupt the EU if it continues to cave to political pressure to bailout Greece and similar entitlement-driven economies.  And if EU resists the pressure and refuses further bailouts, Russia will undoubtedly swoop in with offers of “assistance” to leaders more interested in keeping entitlements flowing than defending and preserving their countries’ freedom and democracy.

Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when we hand out “free” (tax-supported) stuff and get citizens addicted. This is why the founders’ philosophy of individualism, not socialist communitarianism, works to sustain freedom and democracy.

THE COUNTRY’S IN THE VERY BEST OF HANDS: Obama likens his war strategy to . . . an arcade game. “In the beginning there was Operation Overlord. Then came Operation Rolling Thunder, Operation Desert Storm and Operation Enduring Freedom. Now the fight against the Islamic State has introduced a new concept into modern warfare. Call it Operation Whack-a-Mole.”

AT AMAZON, fresh deals on bestselling products, updated every hour.

Also, coupons galore in Grocery & Gourmet Food.

Plus, Kindle Daily Deals.

And, Today’s Featured Digital Deal. The deals are brand new every day, so browse and save!

LLOYD GROVE BLISTERS: Hillary Plays The Victim in CNN Interview. “Any Clinton supporters who hoped that a New Hillary would emerge from Tuesday’s televised grilling of the Democratic presidential frontrunner had to be brutally disillusioned. . . . Advertised by her associates as warm and funny in private, she came across as guarded, quibbling, and pokerfaced under the TV lights. . . . The candidate was, by turns, self-justifying and pugnacious, and occasionally just plain inauthentic, as she complained about her and her husband’s victimization by right-wingers and scandalous book authors—the correct people to blame, in her view, for the fact that six out of 10 voters don’t consider her ‘honest and trustworthy,’ according to a recent CNN poll.”

I WONDER IF IT INVOLVES HACKING? United Grounds All U.S. Flights on ‘Automation Issues,’ FAA Says.

YES, BRISTOL PALIN IS A DISAPPOINTMENT AND YES, WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT.

IF SO, THEY MIGHT WANT TO TRY, YOU KNOW, DISPLAYING IT: Do Judges Have Inherent Dignity? “Over the course of a lazy three day weekend, Judge Mahon beclowned himself and disgraced his office. He did so by subverting the United States Constitution, which he is sworn to uphold and protect, in a vain attempt to protect that now vanished dignity.” If you want dignity, be dignified. If you want respect, be respectable.

ROGER KIMBALL: A Modest Proposal for the New York Times.

What do all these pieces have in common—apart, that is, from that insufferable tone of unearned moral superiority that comes with publication in the Times? Yes, that’s right, they all grandly recommend that someone else fork over the truckloads of cash that Greece wants. Everyone knows Margaret Thatcher’s quip about socialism: sooner or later, you run out of other people’s money. Sooner or later, and it is looking more and more like it might be sooner, the Germans are going to run out of money to pay for the Greeks’ lavish pension plans and retirement schemes.

But all is not lost. The sums Greece wants are quite large, it is true, but every little bit can make a difference. And, as Mr. Krugman & Co. would be the first to insist, this a moral imperative. There’s bleeding going on. It must be stopped. People have to take a stand. So here’s my modest proposal. When the markets open today, The New York Times should shift their entire pension portfolio into Greek bonds.

It’s a moral imperative!

WHAT WAS PARODY A FEW YEARS AGO IS NOW REALITY: Advocacy group distributes sexual ‘consent contracts’ to college students.

The Affirmative Consent Project, which advocates for “yes means yes” sexual consent policies, has been distributing “consent contracts” to college students across the country.

The contract states in big red letters: “YES! We agree to have SEX!” (emphasis original), and asks participants to take a photo together holding the contract. If a camera can’t be found, then the participants would need to fill out the form included on the back of the contract.

The group provided the Washington Examiner with an image of the form, which simply states that on this date (fill-in-the-blank) “We agree to have consensual sex with one another.” The form also provides spaces for two parties to sign and print their names.

Even that probably wouldn’t be enough of a defense against an accusation, when all an accuser has to do is say she was too drunk to consent to the photo or the sexual activity. And remember, if the handwriting on the back is noticeably slurred by both parties (meaning the accused was also too drunk to consent) it doesn’t matter, only the accuser’s word matters.

The contract comes as part of a “Consent Conscious Kit,” which also includes a pen (to sign the contract, duh), breath mints and a condom. The kit comes in either a canvas or faux suede bag with the group’s logo — the male and female gender symbols combined at the circle.

Today’s America has moved beyond parody.